New Perspectives

Love your enemy

2012-02-08T18:27:00.000-08:00

““You have heard that it was said, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.” Matthew 5:43-45

Been thinking a lot about past events and disagreements with others that have led to them seriously disliking me. This verse was very insightful for me today. As i ponder how others have a strong negative view of me; ive realized that though i know i am defined not by their words but by GODs i also recognize that pulling the "Good thing GOD loves you so i dont have to" card isnt how i am called; nor how i will respond.

So Bloggers... I hereby declare i will love those people... Because thats what Jesus would do. :)

In other news... I believe i have found an apartment! It is beautiful and wonderful and CHEAP!!! :) Its close to Brandon which is a plus. Close to 7 Starbucks... Which is also a plus. Close to the school i would go to if i get scholarships. Pretty much a win win win in my book :) Please pray with me that a 1 bedroom becomes available by March 2nd. That is the earliest possible date for April. Sooooo... I am trusting GOD. :) Well i hope everyones weeks are going great. I bid the farewell!

Terra!!!!

2012-02-05T13:43:00.001-08:00

Finally going up north to visit my favorite lady in the world! Love my second family :) can't wait!

Dear GOD

2012-02-04T18:30:00.001-08:00

Fill me with Joy you alone can provide. allow me to fully grasp and soak in your peace that I may live in harmony with you in my heart. Help me trust you better. Help me be better at reading studying understanding remembering and applying your word. Help me be an example. May your name be glorified. In my life at home at work with family with friends with Brandon. Help me remember I am loved. Help me to love you more and notice all you've done. Open my eyes that I may see your gorgeous works. Remove the fear from my heart and mind. Remind me I am protected.

Forgive me for all my trespasses. Forgive me from my distrust in you. Forgive me for sometimes forgetting you and all you've done.

I love you and long to love you more LORD.

Amen

Embracing Change

2012-02-02T19:48:00.000-08:00

A new life is fast approaching. I am optimistic and relentlessly trying to get everything organized before it all launches. 59 days from now i will be an Austinite!!! Yes, that is a real thing! Not only will i be living there, It is a goal to get scholarships and go back to school to finish my degree. I have been searching for Apartments and i am praying this place i am going to look at Friday turns out as "The One." In my humble opinion, Apartments are like a spouse. They have to be perfect and fit all your personality traits in order for it to work out successfully! With my first apartment i could not do without ceiling fans, a gate, cheap, clean, balcony, nice community area and many many many MANY more stipulations. This go around i have 2 requirements. Washer and dryer connections, because i have a washer and dryer. AND Cheap. Of course i can clean it myself... LORD knows i will sanitize it regardless. Seems like washing clothes is not that big of a deal to Austinites... Seeing as how it is IMPOSSIBLE to find any apartments with connections in the actual apartment. Will NOT be washing my pantelones in a grungy washer room with other people... Staying in there for over an hour until they are done and then carrying ALL my laundry back to my house. 1. i am clumsy and could possibly drop all the clean clothes on the floor. 2. Dont want anyone to see my panties..............(long awkward pause)......... Sorry, just being honest in my blog. Sue me!

Pray for me people!

I am SO EXCITED!!!!!!!

Bucktown

2011-10-21T13:11:00.000-07:00

Lately at Starbucks we have been working towards speeding up my store. Well i was so excited because My morning team this last Wednesday had the highest number of transactions in a given half hour than any one else has had in the past 4 months... AND Today i was on bar (which i am not the best bar person... but ive wanted to get better) and beat my score that i made on Wednesday... TWICE IN A ROW!!! I was so blessed by that. My whole team was working so hard and it paid off.

The LORD provided me the strength to finish our Peak and to keep the momentum and speed constant. THANK YOU LORD!!!!

Such a great day at Work. I remembered today why i love my job. Team work, Encouraging employees, and a manager that cares about the partners.

Cleaning House

2011-10-18T18:28:00.000-07:00

The past few days i have been cleaning out drawers and the things stored on shelves in my closet. My room has been a disaster because everything has been out and ive been tossing things that ive kept for far to long and have never used. I am a recovering Hoarder!!! I keep everything. Why?! Because i believe that EVERYTHING can be used for scrapbooks :) But it has been very refreshing. I feel so much better because a lot of crap has been thrown out.

In the process I came across this little thing that my mom got me... I LOVE these things :)

Mine sings let me call you sweet heart

In other news i have the best room mate ever :) She made dinner tonight... Hello i feel spoiled already :) Love you Jules!!!

Weddings Galore

2011-10-13T20:56:00.000-07:00

Over the last 3 weeks i attended 3 weddings and stood in 2. To start the wedding extravaganza Kristin Sylvia because Kristin Hildebrand :) Then was my Brothers wedding to my former roomie Amber. Its was gorgeous. The weather turned out beautifully, it was an all outside wedding/reception. The reception was held at my parents house and boy did it turn out wonderful! Side note: My parents are truly amazing! They re decorated their entire backyard for Derek and Ambers wedding. From putting a pool in to planting tons of trees and flowers they worked so hard preparing for my big bros wonderful day. Their wedding was probably easily one of the prettiest weddings ive ever attended. It was simple and homey and my whole family came in from Arizona to Celebrate with us. It was perfect. Not to mention my Wonderful Boyfriend was the DJ/MC to the event. So of course that made it all the more perfect. It really would not have been the same for me had he not been there to share it with me. Another Side Note: Cudos and special thanks to Brandon for all the hard work and hours he put into the very last minute playlist and reception set up. He did a great job and i appreciate you putting so much time in for my family! I love that boii. Finally to end the Wedding parade was my Best friend Lauren Azzaro who is now happily married to a wonderful man Jonathan aka Scotty Shepherd. Their wedding was as elegant and elegant can be. After a very rainy day the evening cleared up to leave crystal blue skies for their ceremony. Plus Terra was in town so i got to spend a lot of time with her! Which she of course means the world to me so it wouldn't have been the same without her. So glad she could fly in for it! :)

Needless to say i was very exhausted! Though it was a glorious 3 weeks of celebrating the beautiful love these couples share and the holy matrimony and joining of hearts in GODs name. I was blessed to be apart of them as well as to see them all be over! Thanks GOD for finally allowing me time to catch up on the sleep i so desperately needed!

Remaining content. Accepting gifts. Being Thankful

2011-09-18T07:26:00.000-07:00

Today is a new day. A beautiful day. Today I was reminded how often I overlook all the blessings in my life and go about each day with an additude of discontentment and ungratefulness. Oh, how disappointing is this?! I've come to realize how contagious this world is. How easy it is to act like a spoiled brat. How hard it is to be different from the majority of those I am surrounded by constantly. LORD open my eyes! I've prayed this so many times. Today I am revising it.LORD help me to stop quenching my eye lids closed. Kill this evil inside my heart that distracts me from you. Help me to keep my eyes wide open! I want to be better. I have to admit I've struggled with having a heart of gratitude; I have allowed myself to focus more on the negative things in my life like Brandon moving to Austin and not being able to be with him all the time. My financial situation and not being as comfortable or having ad much in my bank account as I used to. Problems with work, not always having Sunday's off. Working all the time. Being so tired and feeling hopeless like I will have to work over 40 hours for the rest of my life. Dwelling on this negative energy. Feeding myself with self loathing and pity. Feeling so sorry for myself and refusing to get over it! I've forgotten my word for 2011... POSITIVE! Well today folks, I will be different! I will have a new state of thinking! I challenge myself to a anti-negativity lifestyle. I will be positive. I will see all that I have been given! I will dwell on the beautiful things in life and refuse to be intoxicated with the problems I think I'm having. The LORD had been nothing but good to me. He has done nothing but continually provide for me. He has been nothing but faithful to me! OH HAPPY DAY! :) The LORD and our Heavenly Father alone has rescued me from this ugliness I've chosen for myself. Darkness will reign no more. The light is shining on me and I feel new again! How Great is our Papa! He is a wonderful GOD! My provider! My love! My life! My everything! So hopeful!

Rain

2011-08-25T08:55:00.000-07:00

Dear LORD,

Please bring Rain. It is incredibly dry and is getting warmer every day. We trust you and Love you

In Jesus name i proclaim this

Amen

Hey Old Friend!

2011-08-24T21:00:00.001-07:00

Soooo... Since July there have been some pretty awesome changes in my life and 1. i apologize for being a horrible blogger and 2. i dont wanna waste anytime talking about how awful i am as a blogger anymore(We all know this!) so lets dive in shall we?!

My wonderful boyfriend and i have been going strong for 3 months now... Excited, Blessed, Challenged, Joyful, Optimistic and whatever other positive adjective you wanna place there is how i am feeling about our relationship. He is unlike any guy ive ever met. He challenges me and encourages me and cares for me so immensely all the time! I love it, i love him, its awesome and i cant express in words how grateful i am for him in my life. My mom always told me that i should never be someones appetizer. That i deserve to be someones main course. Well, hearing that i was always like "Yea, i know... OK mom..." And since i have been with Brandon i have never felt so appreciated and adored in my life. This guy is incredible and i love sharing life with my best friend! :) He recently moved to Austin(this last sunday) and i have been trying my best to stay positive but it is difficult not seeing my sweet boy everyday. I miss him, but at the same time i am very enthusiastic about our relationship getting stronger and growing deeper in love with him which i know will happen with the distance. I also know that many people have had it much worse, so i am grateful he is just an hour away as opposed to states, countries or continents away. Thank you LORD for that!

Another big thing is that our Foster babies unfortunately had their rights terminated and are now going up for adoption. We are in the process of praying and seeking GODs will for their future. We pray that we will have the opportunity to raise the two girls at least. But i know that GODs plan is way better than mine and i trust completely that whatever he decides my heart will be at peace and i know it will be best for the kids. So if you would join my family and I in prayer as we deal with this it would be greatly appreciated!

I got promoted to a Shift Supervisor at Starbucks, which is both exciting and tiring all at the same time. I love my job, but there is a fine line between living to work and working to live. Lately it seems the line is blurred and all i do is work with little living on the side. I am grateful for this amazing opportunity to grow as a leader, i just Pray i wont get burnt out!

My car got tagged today in my Apartment complex parking lot.. Right in front of my apt. IN broad daylight... That was not fun, but i did get it off by scrubbing it with windex. I hope the paint didnt fade though because of the windex... We will see!

Lastly my Cousin had her baby today. And let me tell you this WOW GOD story... She was born dead. The first 4 minutes she had left my cousins womb she had no pulse and was not breathing. After those heart wrenching 4 minutes her heart started beating and she is now healthy as ever and extremely alert and responsive. My mom told me how they put the baby on my cousins chest immediately after being born and within seconds snatched her away and began working on her. I am amazed at how faithful GOD is and equally ecstatic to see what little Ava's mission on earth is. It must be something fantastic for the LORD to spare her life so willingly. She has an amazing testimony. I am PRAISING THE LORD that she is ok! What a horrible tragedy that would have been. Thank you LORD for life.

Why Jesus?!

2011-07-05T14:04:00.000-07:00

I was doing my homework for the Daniel Bible study that i've been doing for the past 10 weeks, and one of the questions today was about why I chose Jesus.

Ive believed in Jesus for a long time. But the reason i am so passionate about him is because he has proved himself Mighty, Faithful, Trustworthy, Loving, Grace-Filled, Merciful, He alone has guarded me and protected me from harm my entire life. The verses in the Bible are true about him. He is Just. He is Love. Jesus is everything to me because he is Real and he alone is the reason i'm still Alive and well!

Plain and Simple. Jesus is real, He's awesome! I am nothing and i have nothing without him.

Royal Family Kids Camp

2011-07-02T11:39:00.000-07:00

Just got back last saturday from RFCK! It was soooooo amazing! I am so grateful that i was able to go and spend time with those kids and love on them. I had a great time.

The LORD really showed himself to me in his faithfulness to provide people or advice or rest, you name it! He was there and he was moving. I am so blessed because i was able to connect with a group of girls (some that were returning campers and others who were brand new to the camp) in a way i didn't expect. We had such an amazing bunch of kids. I love Royal Family Kids Camp cause it forces you to open your mind to the ugliness in the world, but it is so beautiful because the LORD uses all of that ugliness and turns it into something incredible! I saw so many kids radically transformed in those 5 days, kids who wouldn't smile to be beaming by the end of the week. Kids who were afraid of everything to being the most daring courageous of all of them.

It was hard to say goodbye with the knowledge that i wont see most of them again. But i am confident that the LORD has them in his mighty hand. That he is watching over them and that they will be more than okay.

I cant wait til next year :)

PRAISE PRAISE PRAISE!!!!!

2011-06-29T07:44:00.000-07:00

Monday night i over charged my bank account. I had 7 dollars to my name, an Empty gas tank, am not getting paid until friday, and was -$5.20 in debt. Sooooo i was freaking out. Not only because i was not sure how i was going to clean all my pools tuesday with no gas, not sure how i was going to eat food cause my apartment is lacking in the food category, and had NO idea how i was going to pay the overdraft fees that Chase bank charges when you go into the negatives...

As you can imaging Tuesday morning for me was incredibly stressful! I was a little concerned. Of course i knew that the LORD has always provided for me and that this time wouldnt be any different. But i did not see a light for some reason. I was so distracted by my circumstances. Then, the LORD began to do the miraculous. My mom out of no where told me to take the truck to go clean pools, my hope began to rise up. I go to the bank and deposit the 7 dollars i have into my account. Then my amazing room-mate Amber pays me for our cable bill... Another 42 bucks... I deposit that an hour later. After I cleaned pools, I got back to the parentals casa and my mom goes through her pantry and starts throwing food at me. My hope is raising even more. Now i am just started to get excited. In the back of my mind there was still a little concern because of the overdraft fees and i was praying all day that those deposits went in my account fast enough to void them. Anywho, i am praying and trusting because at this point my eyes were now focused on the Creator(where they should have been the entire time). I check my account online and i am no longer in the negatives... I am so grateful at this point. But am waiting until Wednesday(today) to check again for the over draft charges...

WELL WELL WELL!!!! Let me tell you... I checked my Bank account today and the list of activity on my account was changed... the charge to my card that took me into the negatives on my account said that it happened AFTER i had deposited that money in my account. So it no longer had ANY record of me being in the negatives. Instead it looks like i was actually responsible and took care of my funds before the fact.

I CANT STOP SMILING!!!!!! GOD IS SO GOOD! The LORD is so faithful to provide. He is worthy of so much praise. I am so encouraged, especially cause there is a lot going on in my world right now. My faith is on an ultimate high right now, i know without a shadow of a doubt that the LORD is faithful, he IS with me, he IS in control, I do NOT need to be concerned at all!

EAT IT SATAN! You will NOT steal my Joy! :) WOOP!

OUR GOD IS AN AWESOME GOD!!!!!

It may sound like something so little, But this was not chance, this was My GOD watching out for me and protecting me and providing for me and proving to me that he is so much bigger and better than all my doubt! Oh forgive me LORD for doubting you. You are so Awesome! :)

I had to share. I hope you are blessed and encouraged. Wherever you are whatever youre going through He is LORD! He is in Control! :) He's got your back! Yep, My GOD is awesome!!!

20

2011-06-15T18:50:00.000-07:00

Well... I got there. I am 2 decades old now! I knew i needed to blog about my birthday and me getting so old :) But i wanted to take some time to reflect on the past year and share everything that i learned or realizations i came to. Obviously i cant tell you everything i learned cause that would take FOREVERRR but i will share some of the big things :)

1. GOD is for me, he will always love and fight for me no matter how stupid i am. This is one of the biggest things that i learned from GOD during my time with him.

2. GOD is faithful to provide. He proves this to me everyday.

3. Living on your own is expensive

4. Its important to swallow your pride and accept help when you really need the help.

5. I always knew i was pretty independent. But i have really seen growth in me as a person just by supporting myself, the LORD has really used it for good to help me become a stronger person.

6. Having time to yourself is important, to much alone time can be a hinderance.

7. Follow your heart

8. Staying positive is contagious, and people love the positive!

9. Be QUICK to listen, SLOW to respond in anger

10. Think before you speak... Words hurt.

Ill leave it at 10 for now! :)

Oh and my birthday present... I got a plane ticket to go see Terra in North Dakota!! :) I am beyond excited. I cant wait to go visit my second family!

Get Lifted

2011-06-09T13:05:00.001-07:00

So i know these guys, they are pretty skilled! I think they should make it not only because they are pretty cool people, but they are in it for the right reasons. They are called Get Lifted. Watch their newest music video, the link is below :)

http://vimeo.com/24525803

Primping

2011-05-31T23:51:00.000-07:00

Me and my sisters getting ready for a fun night out on the town! Amber(left) was so kind as to pamper Emily and I by successfully doing our hair and make-up for my grandparents 50th anniversary surprise party. This is the final product on our hair and faces... Obviously Amber and I would have changed our clothes into something a little nicer :)

Arizona

2011-05-30T16:41:00.000-07:00

I haven't been to my hometown in 5 years, so i was super excited to come and get to see everyone! I literally have been able to see each member of my family with the exception of two that live in Colorado and one cousin who unfortunately was not able to come to our pool party. My family of 5 and my soon to be sister in law flew into Phoenix on Saturday and that night went to surprise my grandparents for a 50th anniversary celebration my mom and aunts put together for them. I was so proud of them, they have been working on this for a LONGtime! It turned out Beautifully! :) Thennn on Sunday we spent the entire day with my moms side again at my Aunts house, we swam, we ate, laughed, and made more memories! I also got to see cousin Nathan (who i haven't seen in FOREVER!) and his lovely wife and beautiful daughter! :)

Oh and another thing... I LOVE ARIZONA WEATHER!!!! I forgot how much i missed the dry heat. I have never been a fan of humidity... Though Texas is home, i will always love Arizona heat better!

Worship worship and more Worship!

2011-05-22T14:34:00.000-07:00

TODAY IS SO AWESOME!!!!!!!!!! I was up as a backing vocalist today and boy did we have a million curve balls thrown at us this morning. From adding new songs and changing half of the set, practicing that set and then at the last minute changing it again to the original set list, to sean adding songs to the set spontaneously! There were many technical, instrumental, and vocal mess ups... But PRAISE GOD Worship is NOT at all about how we sound or the smoothness of our worship set! His presence was moving in RCCC today. His great love and faithfulness was so encouraging to me. I love how the LORD uses the inconvenient situations to show his glory and righteousness. He is sovereign!

Overall i left today so blessed and encouraged because our GOD is an awesome GOD! He is so faithful to provide and each day that i am reminded of my unworthiness i am also reminded of his holiness.

Thank you GOD for love! :)

1 Corinthians 13... How my GOD Loves and calls us to Love :)

Looking Up

2011-05-21T12:12:00.000-07:00

Rumors of the Rapture taking place today have spread like wild fire... Kinda pitiful how everyone wants to live their own life; paying no attention to GOD or his will for their lives... But the second that they hear the world could be ending they start paying attention to him. This is proof that our GOD is a patient loving accepting forgiving mighty awesome endless powerful GOD. How great is his love for us that he allows us to take advantage of him and all his creation, yet has a longing to be with us and for us to trust him. He is so quick to forgive and hold us even when we have turned our backs completely on him.

I wish i could say i wasn't one of those people. But so many times i tell him "No really GOD, ive got this one!" Yet when my plans fail and leave me broken and on my knees he is so quick to run and hold me. Wow, i am so unworthy!

Lord, Help me be better!

Grace

2011-05-14T20:53:00.000-07:00

Today was a GORGEOUS day! I was so blessed to spend my whole lunch break outside my work and enjoy GODs Beauty. I read Romans 8 over and over again and was humbled by the truth that my GOD loves me and has forgiven me completely of my past. What an amazing Creator we have. I am so grateful i am not living the life i once was, Jesus is my savior! My life is so free now... LORD forgive me for forgetting all the blessings you've provided.

GOD

2011-05-13T14:25:00.000-07:00

The love of my life. My rock and my salvation. My redeemer. My Healer. My everything! I was so incredibly encouraged today while havin my time with the LORD. I am in the middle of this Bible study on Daniel and wow has it taken me for a spiritual ride. Some weeks i have felt so close to GOD and others the enemy has used to attack and tear me down to the core. I am so grateful for this study though, no matter how hard it hurts to hear where i need improvement i know that the LORD is using this to grow me into the Woman he has called me to be. He is using this to better me not only as a follower of him but as a future wife and mother.

Today i had to stop and rejoice because of the amazing promises that are yet to come. How amazing Heaven is going to be and the truth of how strong our GOD is!

Hebrews 12:28-29

"Therefore since we are receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful and so worship GOD acceptably with reverence and awe, for our GOD is a consuming fire!"

Psalm 62:1-2

"My soul finds rest in GOD alone; my salvation comes from him, he alone is my rock and salvation. He is my fortress, i will never be shaken."

I LOVE THAT! He is all-powerful and all- knowing. He alone is my security! I find none in anything or anyone, but HE ALONE will provide the security that i need.

He is and always has been and always will be faithful to provide.

I think im going to get Jehovah Yireh in Hebrew writing tattooed to my ring finger... It means the Lord Provides. He has really been showing that to me lately and reminding me of his amazing love for me.

What a great GOD we serve! He deserves all the praise and so much more!

Fake-N-Bake, Home Teeth Whitening and Asthma

2011-05-11T06:58:00.001-07:00

These things have been a very common thing for me lately... My stomach is 2 shades from being black, i think i need to back off the human oven for a little bit! Its getting gross :) In 20 years i am going to be that woman that everyone helps across the street because they think i am 80 when in all reality i will be a 40 year old wife/mother with children that are ranging from 18-2. What am i doing to myself?! Definitely NOT me in that bathing suit.

I bet this little device that whitens my teeth is going to have major negative side effects like the browning or losing of teeth. Yet i still have this stupid blue light shining in my mouth as i type. (Twilight Teeth, you drool all over yourself. but it works!)

Its a good thing looks dont matter right?!

Then there is the infamous inhaler.... I dont know what the effects of todays Asthma appointment is going to have on changes in meds and what not but i am praying that they give me something that helps me breathe better. It has definitely been horrible the past few weeks. LORD willing they can just replace my lungs :)

Simple Things

2011-05-07T10:30:00.000-07:00

Nothin like Jesus, Omelets, freshly cut mangos and a huge cup of coffee to start the day!

Gotta love the simple things

"Today is the day the LORD has made. We will rejoice and be glad in it!" Psalm 118:24

Bin Laden

2011-05-05T19:09:00.000-07:00

http://news.yahoo.com/s/yblog_thelookout/20110505/ts_yblog_thelookout/obama-bin-laden-sea-burial-was-respectful

I just watched this interview with the president and i was very pleasantly surprised. I am in complete agreement with him for the first time!

Doesnt matter what your politics are, Bin Laden did terrible things... But he is still a person, and no one deserves to be disrespected publicly with pictures of their bodies or videos of their death being put on display for the world to mock. Everyone knows what he did was wrong... Im grateful that the LORD allowed justice to be done, i am also grateful that our nations leader was respectful of Bin Laden as a human and didn't allow us to stoop down to a terrorists level.

America will rise above!

National Day of Prayer

2011-05-05T19:03:00.000-07:00

Happy National Day of Prayer everyone!!! Tonight i went to church thinking i was going to a missions meeting about Japan, but i definitely got the date wrong... Looks like the LORD really wanted me to go to prayer night!

I love how when just a few believers gather together in prayer and worship the LORD shows up and does miraculous things. He has a mission for River City. I believe he is starting a movement and i am soooo excited about where all this is going. Im blessed to be apart of such a loving church family!

Thank you LORD for blessings <3

Daydreaming

2011-05-05T11:12:00.000-07:00

LORD knows this is where i wanna be right now. Cant i just live on a deserted island where money doesnt exist?!

Power in Words

2011-05-04T18:31:00.000-07:00

So lately ive really been watching what i say, not because im constantly talking inappropriately or anything along those lines.. But i am one that will openly tell you how i feel when i am feeling it. Well, im doing a Beth Moore study on Daniel and the first week she hit on the power of words and how important it is to really watch what you say because satan cant read minds. But he does hear what we speak, so when we are openly talking about what we are struggling with or how discouraged we are or how bad this day sucks and stuff along those lines, it opens the door for a whole lotta nastyyy to start pouring in.

Well, i was challenged by that... So i took it upon myself to practice it! Ummm, i dont think ive ever seen the results of a discipline like this so fast. The past week in a half or so ive been a lot more positive and less prone to a bad attitude. Having bad days are not as common. Or if something rough happens when i watch my tongue and seek the LORD in those times it has honestly made a huge difference!

Anywaysssss, i just thought i would share that because i figured "Hey, if it helped me maybe it could help someone else!" So there ya go, i hope that encourages you... It really does work!

Oh, and i recently encountered the customer that doesnt like me at Starbucks... I ended up giving her her drink for free cause a co-worker was using the register and she actually smiled. I was very blessed by that! :)

Today has been a long exhausting day! I am going to bed... Peace

Beautiful Days :)

2011-05-01T11:42:00.001-07:00

Lately the weather has been exceptionally beautiful. It starts kinda muggy and humid and gross but by the time it should be really hot and even more gross GOD has really been throwing me a curve ball because the sun will be out, and it is all breezy and just lovely! I wish i could live outside. But its also mosquito season and ive been getting eaten alive, so ive been admiring a lot by looking out the window!

Sean started a new series today on Ruth... OH BABY! It is already incredible. I love it! I have been constantly reminded of GODs presence in my life, and his faithfulness to provide even when things look down. I have been so amazed by him. Ive never seen this side of him before; but i am loving every minute of it!

Ive been convicted lately about prayer cause, not gunna lie ive been pretty crappy at staying on top of that lately... But the past few days i really felt a tug to pray for this one customer at Starbucks who seriously Hates my guts. Every time she comes through the drive thru and i am working the register. (which is everyday i work the register... by the way) She literally gives me a look like "Great. You Again!" I dont know what i did to this woman, but she despises me, ask any of my co-workers! They will tell you! Anyways, ive been thinking about her a lot and the LORD really laid on my heart to pray for her. So i have been and surprisingly i think about her all the time so i find myself praying for her ALL THE TIME! And then in those times i start to think of other people who i know need prayer. SO now i am in this cycle of praying more and more each day. Which is a good problem to have.

GOD is to good to me. I see how unworthy i am of his love everyday. But i am so grateful that our GOD is a forgiving gracious GOD who lives and breathes with us and in us.

I hope you are blessed this week!

Easter Weekend

2011-04-27T16:14:00.000-07:00

Ok so this Easter was by far the BEST Easter ever! I dont know if its because i am at a different place spiritually than i have ever been before or what but whatever the reason, i loved it. Worship was ROCKIN! Seans Message was about second chances and it was just so encouraging. I will never understand Christs love for me but i am so incredibly grateful for his sacrifice. After being at church most of the day i went to the parentals and we did the annual egg hunt and enjoyed a lovely feast as a family :) I made everyone get back in their church clothes so we could take a family picture :) Below is my beautiful family Dad, Mom, Me, Derek, My future sister-in-law Amber(isnt she lovely! She fits right in with the Brandner clan) and my baby sister Emma in the front! I am so incredibly blessed to have such a close family. I often take it for granted... But i realize the LORD has been good to me! To him be all the Glory and Praise!!

I hope this easter was more than the candy and pastel colors for you too :)

Maddie :)

2011-04-27T16:11:00.000-07:00

I cant believe i havent posted about Maddie! Derek got a new dog... Great dane... She is beautiful and i love her so much! She is only 9 weeks old and already at least 20 pounds! I took her for a walk last week and she went half way and i ended up having to carry her home because 1. She may be a baby, but boy is she a Diva... And 2. She was wayyyy tired. Pretty sure she was panting for at least 2 hours AFTER we were done walking. I cant help but love her! I am totally and completely smitten over that puppy.

I say this as she sleeps so peacefully next to me :) Oh the Joys of being Aunt B <3

Here is my Niece

Christ is RISEN!!!!!

2011-04-24T11:50:00.000-07:00

What an amazing day it has been so far! :) GOD has done an amazing work so far, we had such a great turn out. Nothing is better than worshiping our KING with fellow believers. So many new faces... So encouraging to me! I love my church family so much.

A great song for ya :)

Blessed Redeemer by Casting Crowns. Really listen to the words! Jesus' Amazing character shines through the truth behind the lyrics.

Heres a link for you:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XyD1FSC3d08

I hope your Easter was more than Pastel Colors and Chocolate! What an Faithful Mighty GOD we have.

WOW GOD!

2011-04-22T13:52:00.000-07:00

So yesterdays post i wrote right before worship practice. Well, i start praying and reassuring myself and trying to stay positive. I get to practice and i kid you not... One of the first things that was said to me was about how Natalie wanted me to come over for dinner because she knew i didnt have any food and the thing that got me was "I am here helping to provide for you!" Immediately i started crying. I knew that was from GOD clarifying to me that he is my provider. Then Franny told me she was taking me grocery shopping and that made me cry more and she didnt ask me if i wanted her to she told me she was taking me and she wouldnt accept no for an answer.

I dont do well with accepting help. Or asking for it.

But GOD is so faithful to provide. And yesterday he moved so quickly. I was not expecting that and i had told myself that i wasnt going to let the bad news i received yesterday affect practice, that i was just going to go and worship and then go home and everything would be fine. Well, GOD had a different plan. He brought everything to the surface and im glad he did... He knows best!

I had to share with you! GOD is awesome and so faithful... I will never understand his love for me! But im sure glad i have it

Oh silly Finances

2011-04-21T15:50:00.000-07:00

Found out today of a major pay cut that i will be receiving through my main source of income... Unfortunate because i will definitely feel the pain of that one! Lately ive been very comfortable with my financial situation because i have always had left overs to go and do as i please and i could be very generous and not feel the sting of it. Now, as i realize i am going to have to make serious sacrifices... I am trying to stay positive and remind myself that GOD can do a lot with a lot... He can also do a lot with a little. I know he is going to provide for me. Maybe not in the ways i think or want him to, but he has always given me what i needed! I have faith that my faithful GOD will stay constant and unchanging and provide for me just the same.

I hate money, not only because it has divided people so easily and destroyed relationships; also because it toys with my emotions and stresses me out so easily. I dont want it but in the culture we live in it stresses how much you NEED it to survive and to be happy. One thing i know for sure is that money has NEVERRRRR made me happy! Never!

So i am sticking with GOD in this trial... Money, you aint got nothin on the creator! You will not steal my joy!

Beth Moore Study

2011-04-20T13:33:00.000-07:00

Today was the first week of 12 that i will be having a Bible study with a bunch of awesome ladies from my church! :) I am super excited. The study is Beth Moore's (which i know already makes it incredible) Video study on Daniel... I have to say i am so excited and looking forward to the upcoming weeks. Today she talked about mainly historical stuff and mentioned how GODs word is Timeless and meant to fit every generation. She totally opened my eyes to see how the word is relevant to me right now in the 21st Century! I think it is awesome thinking of how literature written in 650BC is relevant in 2011AD! GOD is so cool!

Anyway just to share with you the main things i took away from today...

I am living in a Babylon of my own. This world that we live in is equivalent to the Babylon of the beginning of times. Babylon is a way of thinking; a philosophy of "I am, and there are none above me" It is a depiction of our broken sinful world.

One thought that has stuck with me today is "We were assigned to this world by GOD. satan has assigned the world to us." She also said something that i swear she was speaking right to me! The idea that we have been placed in our own Babylon. We have been placed in it at this time for a reason. I have been assigned to this life, this place, these trials i face at this time and at every moment in my life for a reason! There is purpose and reasons behind each and everything we face. It gives life more depth i think. Rather than just constantly going through the motions, taking time to break it all apart and see GODs face in everything we have done, are doing, and will do. (Sorry if i totally confused you...)

Exciting things are happening! I am so grateful for this study. It came at the perfect time! GOD knows best :)

Jesus

2011-04-19T14:27:00.001-07:00

For the past few weeks ive been seeing Jesus in new ways which is really exciting for me, our GOD is so huge and we will never be able to fully grasp his awesomeness; but i think its really sweet when he reveals new sides of himself to us! Today in particular made me laugh out loud... I was preparing for College group tonight and we are going over Matthew 21 and a few other verses from various books that relate to Matthew's chapter. Well as i am reading i get to the part where Jesus is speaking to the pharisees about Johns baptism and he asks them one simple question to follow their question on what authority he is under. I think it is amazing that our Jesus who is so gentle and full of love and grace is equally bold and wont take no crap from anyone! :) Jesus is Meek... He is incredible! I had to share!!

Stronger- Mandisa

2011-04-18T12:38:00.000-07:00

So, i am currently obsessed with Mandisa's new song Stronger :) Not only because it is currently relevant in my life but because Girlfriend knows how to throw down! So if you dont listen to Klove or have NO idea who Mandisa is then YOU HAD BEST be lookin it up on Youtube :) Definitely worth the 4 min.

In Starbucks news i am definitely starting to get into the groove of things... I know ive been there for over 3 months, All im sayin is im definitely getting mad coffee makin skills! Not braggin or anything... Just sayin :) I really do love working there, I find that the times when we are slow are great blessings and i use them to catch my breath and rejuvenate for when all of San Antonio wants coffee at the same time!

In Apartment news our AC had definitely gone out again... For the 6th time... So thats frustrating but not enough to make me wanna raise hell in the apartment office. It takes a lot to get me seriously heated(by heated i mean furious... cause i am definitely very heated physically right now. My apartment is a sauna!) I love love love love love living on my own! I am super grateful for it. I get to see my family reasonable amounts but i left on great terms so seeing them is an added bonus :) Though i do miss living in the country very much! There is nothing like it and when i am married i am DEFINITELY going back to the country living. I hate living in the city... In the center of it all. Yuck... I am convinced GOD made me to be surrounded my nature not buildings. I anxiously await the days when i can spend most of my time in a rocking chair next to my husband or walking through nature :) Ok now im getting giddy :) haha

In misc. news i have grown to love my church way more! Its so great to be connected to a community of believers/family that encourage and uplift me in the dark times. I have really been awestruck by GODs faithfulness. Everyday he shows me how he loves me and he is ALWAYS faithful! Something he alone can be. Its incredible. Oh, and i am seriously considering moving to California in about a year... To pursue acting of course! :)

I hope all of ya'll are blessed ;)

GOD Speed Brothers/Sisters in Christ!

Blessed :)

2011-04-01T21:59:00.001-07:00

The LORD is faithful to provide :) This is the statement i have been proclaiming for the past several hours. He has been so good to me. I cant stop smiling :) AHHHH SO EXCITED!!!!!

As some may know a few months ago i auditioned for a short film and got the part of Ashley Sterling a minor role... But a role in a film none the less. Just grateful for the opportunity to dive back into acting, i never really expected for it to go anywhere HUGE.... Holy Toledo... The LORD is faithful to provide!

Ever since i can remember i have always wanted to be an actress in film. ALWAYS... Ive been acting since birth basically. My mom was a director and she would always cast me as the little girl whenever a little girl was needed. I fell in love!

Anyways, back to the juicy stuff :) I sat down with my director today... Not only has the show been SAG approved (Screen Actors Guild) which is a HUGE honor... But, we made it to TV!!!!! Our TV series will be promoted on Nickelodeon and MTV... Hello Opportunity! Can you say PRAISE GOD!!!! Not only that but i am now officially a SAG member myself. SAG meaning Hollywood knows about our show... SAG meaning i am stepping into the world of Professional Film... SAG... Me; a nobody, is a SAG member. I will also be paid for the TV series which i was NOT expecting!

I feel so incredibly blessed. The LORD is faithful to Provide :)

No Regrets

2011-03-31T11:59:00.000-07:00

Just sittin here with my feet up thinkin about how much better life would be if i lived without regretting. Without spending time wishing i had changed the way i responded to things or how i could have done things differently.

Like Monday. I worked out for the first time in a while. I decided to go on the tricycle in my little gym... I was on that thing for 20 minutes and i thought i was going to die! For the next hour i really wished that i had slept the extra hour instead of waking up early only to feel like my life was ending. It was horrible. But the rest of the day i was walking a few inches taller because i successfully beat the crap out of myself!

I wish i wouldnt make so many mistakes and that i would think before i: Speak, Eat, Make decisions, and live! I do so many stupid things on a daily basis. Part of that has to do with because thats just who i am... Deal with it... But the other part is because i just go with it and dont really take time to realize what the effect of that is going to bring. Like girlscout cookies... Obvious that choice brings nothing by bigger sizes!

I can beat myself up all day. But all of it is pointless because i cant change what ive done. SO WHY DO I TRY TO! I am grateful for all my mistakes. The LORD has been so faithful to me by showing me how much stronger i am because of them. Gosh, only the creator could make me better by my stupidity! I am beginning to see and appreciate him in a whole new way. Its pretty awesome!

In other news... Baby Chelsea McGinnis is coming any moment now! :) Praise GOD!!!! I am so excited

New Thinking

2011-03-18T11:03:00.001-07:00

So lately things (if im honest) have kinda sucked! But this time around the debby downer mood has not followed me, I am so amazed and blessed by all the times ive seen GOD this past week. Everyday i either hear a song, read a bible verse, hear a comment or see something pretty that is a reminder that GOD is here with me and that he is carrying me through this. Even though i continually get discouraged throughout my days, my hope remains in him, because just around the bend there is something fantastic waiting to be discovered!

I will keep my chin up and trust in the one who rescued my soul from the fire!

My encouragement today came from Biblegateway.com Daily Bible Verse.

“May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”~ROMANS 15:13

Mercies in Disguise

2011-03-17T15:50:00.000-07:00

Over the past few weeks the LORD has really been doing a work in me. Its definitely not an easy one! But ive found a lot of encouragement and hope from a few songs.

The first one i heard on KLove after i encountered a really tough situation! Funny how he makes everything work out for good, i know this will be no different from all the other hard times! I am actually very excited to see where this leads me. (Kinda hope it comes quick! haha) The second was actually a Rascal Flatts song... Im convinced it was written from GOD to me! If you dont think so... Hush it... haha dont steal my thundaaa!!!

Blessings by Laura Story

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZRg-SEQJSE

I wont let go by Rascal Flatts

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cIIorYfTSTo

One of my blessings in disguise was of course Terra. Papa knew i needed her to be here when it got real hard.

Thankful :)

2011-03-12T19:41:00.000-08:00

Ive really taken some time lately to dwell on the many blessings ive been given. I am so grateful for such a great GOD who is always faithful! Always present. Always protecting and guiding me. He is so patient and understanding. Forgiving and loving me in spite of my constant stupidity! He is amazing in every way and i am super grateful that he is so always with me!

Im blessed to have so many people who genuinely care about me. I take them for granted so much, i will NEVER deserve them. I have such great friends and amazing influences. I have learned so much from them. The LORD has used them in so many ways to help direct me and teach me right. They tell me the truth in love, even when the truth is telling me im being an idiot! I love my friends and family!!! I can never express my appreciation or gratitude enough to you. But if you're reading this and you have in some way or another impacted my life know that i love love love love love love you and appreciate you way more than you will ever know! :)

I realized this morning as i was spending time with the LORD all the things he has given me; things i look at every day and pass by as if it was no blessing at all... Like my couch, and dining room table! My car, my apartment! He has given me so much! What a great life he has given me. WOW dont i feel like crap for constantly walking by and not acknowledging his generosity!

Our GOD is an AWESOME GOD!!!!!! :)

Blessings in Obedience

2011-03-11T19:04:00.001-08:00

Recently i've been given a task, a task that is not only extremely hard; but one that i've been avoiding for a while now. You know how GOD is patient and amazing all the time. Well, he was very patient with me, let me run my own course into destruction that is totally my fault. He watched and waited for me to turn to him and ask for him to take control. Well finally i broke down like us humans do, i realized i was walking away from the path of righteousness that i have so heavily been determined to follow. I ignored my convictions, and i'm now paying for it.

But the amazing thing, is that when GOD so clearly spoke to me and gave me the solution; though i didn't like the solution because it wasn't what i wanted, he blessed me today in so many ways because i was obedient to it. Today was great; Yesterday i was DREADING today. I cant help but Praise Him for such a great day. The weather was absolutely stunning. I had a great day at work, laughed a lot! (Which i did not expect to be doing much of that today) I felt so alive and free. What an AMAZING and FAITHFUL GOD we have!

I had to share my blessings with you. I am so encouraged. I still feel like an idiot for continuing on with something that i knew was wrong. But i am so grateful for the lesson of Obedience and that i need to listen immediately, rather than when i want to.

I LOVE MY GOD!

Trials

2011-03-10T20:20:00.000-08:00

In the stillness of my mind the LORD spoke to me about trials. I was super encouraged; thought i would share with you.

"In this life you have been given many trials. In these trials rejoice; for the LORD has entrusted you with them so that you will succeed in bringing him Glory. Not that you should fail. If however; you do fail, the LORD will not be disappointed. But make haste. For the LORD will give you the strength you need to succeed!"

Finding Hope in scripture

2011-03-09T14:03:00.001-08:00

Yesterday was super rough for me. So at College Group Nick Fox gave me scripture. I wanted to share it cause i was very encouraged by it! :) Hope you enjoy!

¹I am the man who has seen affliction
by the rod of the LORD’s wrath.
² He has driven me away and made me walk
in darkness rather than light;
³ indeed, he has turned his hand against me
again and again, all day long.

⁴ He has made my skin and my flesh grow old
and has broken my bones.
⁵ He has besieged me and surrounded me
with bitterness and hardship.
⁶ He has made me dwell in darkness
like those long dead.

⁷ He has walled me in so I cannot escape;
he has weighed me down with chains.
⁸ Even when I call out or cry for help,
he shuts out my prayer.
⁹ He has barred my way with blocks of stone;
he has made my paths crooked.

¹⁰ Like a bear lying in wait,
like a lion in hiding,
¹¹ he dragged me from the path and mangled me
and left me without help.
¹² He drew his bow
and made me the target for his arrows.

¹³ He pierced my heart
with arrows from his quiver.
¹⁴ I became the laughingstock of all my people;
they mock me in song all day long.
¹⁵ He has filled me with bitter herbs
and given me gall to drink.

¹⁶ He has broken my teeth with gravel;
he has trampled me in the dust.
¹⁷ I have been deprived of peace;
I have forgotten what prosperity is.
¹⁸ So I say, “My splendor is gone
and all that I had hoped from the LORD.”

¹⁹ I remember my affliction and my wandering,
the bitterness and the gall.
²⁰ I well remember them,
and my soul is downcast within me.
²¹ Yet this I call to mind
and therefore I have hope:

²² Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
²³ They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.
²⁴ I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion;
therefore I will wait for him.”

²⁵ The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him,
to the one who seeks him;
²⁶ it is good to wait quietly
for the salvation of the LORD.
²⁷ It is good for a man to bear the yoke
while he is young.

²⁸ Let him sit alone in silence,
for the LORD has laid it on him.
²⁹ Let him bury his face in the dust—
there may yet be hope.
³⁰ Let him offer his cheek to one who would strike him,
and let him be filled with disgrace.

³¹ For no one is cast off
by the Lord forever.
³² Though he brings grief, he will show compassion,
so great is his unfailing love.
³³ For he does not willingly bring affliction
or grief to anyone.

³⁴ To crush underfoot
all prisoners in the land,
³⁵ to deny people their rights
before the Most High,
³⁶ to deprive them of justice—
would not the Lord see such things?

³⁷ Who can speak and have it happen
if the Lord has not decreed it?
³⁸ Is it not from the mouth of the Most High
that both calamities and good things come?
³⁹ Why should the living complain
when punished for their sins?

⁴⁰ Let us examine our ways and test them,
and let us return to the LORD.
⁴¹ Let us lift up our hearts and our hands
to God in heaven, and say:
⁴² “We have sinned and rebelled
and you have not forgiven.

⁴³ “You have covered yourself with anger and pursued us;
you have slain without pity.
⁴⁴ You have covered yourself with a cloud
so that no prayer can get through.
⁴⁵ You have made us scum and refuse
among the nations.

⁴⁶ “All our enemies have opened their mouths
wide against us.
⁴⁷ We have suffered terror and pitfalls,
ruin and destruction.”
⁴⁸ Streams of tears flow from my eyes
because my people are destroyed.

⁴⁹ My eyes will flow unceasingly,
without relief,
⁵⁰ until the LORD looks down
from heaven and sees.
⁵¹ What I see brings grief to my soul
because of all the women of my city.

⁵² Those who were my enemies without cause
hunted me like a bird.
⁵³ They tried to end my life in a pit
and threw stones at me;
⁵⁴ the waters closed over my head,
and I thought I was about to perish.

⁵⁵ I called on your name, LORD,
from the depths of the pit.
⁵⁶ You heard my plea: “Do not close your ears
to my cry for relief.”
⁵⁷ You came near when I called you,
and you said, “Do not fear.”

⁵⁸ You, Lord, took up my case;
you redeemed my life.
⁵⁹ LORD, you have seen the wrong done to me.
Uphold my cause!
⁶⁰ You have seen the depth of their vengeance,
all their plots against me.

⁶¹ LORD, you have heard their insults,
all their plots against me—
⁶² what my enemies whisper and mutter
against me all day long.
⁶³ Look at them! Sitting or standing,
they mock me in their songs.

⁶⁴ Pay them back what they deserve, LORD,
for what their hands have done.
⁶⁵ Put a veil over their hearts,
and may your curse be on them!
⁶⁶ Pursue them in anger and destroy them
from under the heavens of the LORD.

Life :)

2011-03-07T13:00:00.000-08:00

Gunna give an update on things Brittany. :)

Ive been at Starbucks for almost 2 months now. I absolutely LOVE it :) It is super fun and super stressful at times but its always interesting and gives me lots of good stories. Today i was dared by some co-workers to stick my hand in a pitcher full of ice and water.... I basically rocked it for 13 minutes! Im hard core :) My hand was numb for like 10 minutes after and super red. I love the people i work with, They are awesome! So it makes the job way more enjoyable. But also i am surrounded by people all the time which makes it way more interesting. :) People crack me up!!

Pool cleaning has reached its easy stages... PRAISE GOD!!! After the freeze i was pretty ready to call it quits but i didn't wanna let my Daddy down so i stuck with it like a hoss... Basically i enjoy the fact that i get to be outside a lot, Not crazy about the driving EVERYWHERE and since Texas is so flippin huge it takes me forever to get to my jobs. But GOD has blessed me with beautiful weather these past few weeks so i am super grateful for it!

I miss the foster kids like Crazy. I dont cry every time i think about them which is a great thing. But i they are still on my mind everyday and i wonder how they are. Rumor has it that they are adjusting very well to their new home which is another HUGE blessing and i am soooo grateful for that too! :) GOD is faithful.

Basically things are not as bad as i make them out to be at times. The Lord has definitely blessed me this year with helping me stay positive. Seriously it has been a great year so far in the midst of everything that has been going on.

I said it before and ill say it again... GOD is Good and super Faithful and Amazing and just GREAT! :) I dont deserve him but i am super glad he never leaves my side!

Positively Lovely

2011-02-25T12:04:00.000-08:00

2011 is in its 2nd Month! Wow how fast this new year has already been going by. At the beginning of the year i took a 30 Day challenge with KLOVE radio and listened to ONLY christian music for a whole month. During that month i went through major music mood swings, i loved that station and then i hated it. Sometimes i just turned my radio off because i didnt want to hear the same song again. Then other times i was super encouraged by the stories, and i loved how people shared their life stories on the radio. And after about 2 weeks i was addicted! I looked forward to hearing all the great stories about how GOD Wowed people. And hearing the testimonies of how GOD worked in all these peoples lives. I also had a chance to challenge myself in a new way this year. What KLOVE has been doing for the past couple years is that by the end of January you pick a word for yourself that you want to live by for that year. Well i had no idea they did that until this year so i accepted the challenge.

And my word is

POSITIVE

So far its been good. I have been trying hard to find the good in every situation and though i know that 2011 is just beginning; and there will be many trials that fall on my path. I am looking forward to beating negativity and becoming a more positive person :)

Growin up

2011-02-23T14:54:00.000-08:00

This past tuesday is 3 weeks of living on my own. So far it has been FANTASTIC! Ive loved most every minute. It has opened the door to a lot more responsibility and stuff like that. I have learned a little about myself but i look forward to all the other lessons that are going to come my way. Life has been CRAZY lately though, i have something every single day of the week which makes of a lot of exhaustion, but at least im never bored. :)

Starbucks has been fantastic. Everyday i can see myself getting better at it. Though i have not mastered that job by any means i feel less like an idiot and more like i kinda have an idea how to successfully do my job! I also love my co-workers. I work with some awesome peeps! :)

Derek and Amber are Engaged!!!!! So wedding planning here i come :) Of course Lauren and Jonathan are engaged too and both of their weddings are this fall, so i have a lot of showers to plan, gifts to buy, Appointments to make, pictures to take and everything else that comes with weddings! But i am loving every minute of it... And i am totally using this as a learning experience for what NOT to do and what TO do for my wedding :) Yayyyyy!!! I am so grateful for the amazing future sister in law that GOD has blessed me with. She is also a great room mate and we have gotten a lot closer in these past 3 weeks! We spend lots of time together... lots of time... i mean a lot. Like tons.

The kiddos leaving was hard, especially since it happened right after i left home so it was kind of a shock for a bit but like everything else in my life GOD brought me through it and i am a lot stronger and better off because of it. Though i miss them a lot and think of them every single day i know that GOD has them in his hands and they are safe and deeply loved! So that gives me peace.

Overall life has definitely improved! It really is amazing how much a person changes with added responsibility.

Im lovin every minute of this journey :)

End of a Story and the beginning of lots of tears!

2011-02-17T18:01:00.000-08:00

The kiddos left today. I have to admit this morning i forgot that they were leaving today. I moved out into my own place Feb 1st and took a second Job as a Starbucks Barista. So a long with the crazy busy schedule of juggling 2 jobs as well as a social life i have had little time for rest and a lot of running errands and taking care of my responsibilities as an adult. Weird... I am considered a legit adult now. Anyways, i had the opening shift this morning at the good ol' coffee shop, My babies left forever at 9:30, my shift was until 11... Therefore i knew that i wasnt going to be there so we had a goodbye dinner last night at Red Robin. Got the kiddos Ice Cream and i took about 10 minutes kissing and holding them tightly, just cherishing every second of our final moments together. Thankfully i praised GOD for at least being able to say goodbye. Then today came... After the busy morning and most of the exhaustion left my body i remembered... I called my mom and she explained the morning to me in between sobs. She was so great with them. Though she will never admit that; i saw the love and grace she poured out upon those angels with my own eyes. I will never forget the sacrifices she made for them. She gave up so much to love and raise those babies that should never have left their birth mother in the first place. I hope that someday i can be 1/2 the mother that my mom was to them. I learned a great deal from her! What an amazing woman; i have been blessed! It didnt hit me until about 11:15 after talking to my mom. When i realized i was never going to see my little Jazzy again. I was never going to hear her call my name (Bernie as she would say). I was never going to see Ariel wabble over to me only as fast as a 1 year old can walk. I would never feel her squeeze my neck when i picked her up. And i would never get to listen to Clifford stumble through his books or ask ridiculous questions about things that dont matter or hear him laugh. Its the little things that i am going to miss the most. I have their smiles implanted in my head. I cant get their giggles or voices out of my head. My heart is breaking.

But i wont lose hope. I know that this is the time to be praising GOD for the amazing moments and memories that i will never forget. The experience of a lifetime to watch those kids grow. I should be thanking him for being so merciful to my family and to those kids!

It still doesnt make saying goodbye any easier! Please pray for my family! Pray for the kids.

Starbucks Training

2011-01-19T17:26:00.000-08:00

Well Folks today was day 2 of training with Starbucks. First of all i am very stoked to have this job, yes i applied because of Terra, so far it has been a blast! The first day was just a 4 hour shift reading paper work and doing a coffee tasting. The coffee tasting was kind of cool, not so delicious, but it was neat to see the process and to hear about the history and stuff. Today however was an 8 hour shift where i did a little book work, cleaned, cleaned and cleaned some more, did 3 coffee tastings and now i have 4 stickers in my coffee passport(it may sound lame but i actually really like the idea of having a cute little booklet full of stickers and descriptions of the different coffee) and i learned how to steam milk! Which is one of the main steps to making most of the drinks! I also learned the hard way that when you drink to much caffeine you get really jittery, random body shake spasms and a throbbing head. Lets just say i wont be drinking coffee on my breaks anymore!

Tomorrow i begin to learn the recipes for the drinks! Lets pray i dont spill myself to much!

I totally love my job though... I work with some pretty cool peeps :)

I know its been an eternity!

2011-01-11T07:16:00.001-08:00

I am the worst blogger in the world! I will make it up to you by posting one heck of a long blog with pictures and details about the things that have been going on :)

Ill start with the kiddos. We have had them for 5 almost 6 (jan 27) months. It has been quite the journey. And I have grown very fond of each kid in their own way! As a new years resolution i want to be a more positive person, so i will tell you what i love about each of my babys :)

CJ aka Clifford or Bud as i call him he is a different kinda kid! He is shy in his own way with a lot of energy and a hint of sweetheart all in the same tiny little body. He loves to be loved, but hates to be touched... Unless its by my dad. He has this spirit about him that if nurtured correctly could dramatically impact others! He is a very kind hearted little boy, he cares about people very much and is extremely forgiving! He has a very creative mind, he loves to create things and play different characters. I could see him being a very misunderstood artistic genius someday! My prayer for CJ is that when he goes home he wont follow the leader of the negative male influences. But that he will remember my Dad and the impact he made in his life. That he will strive to be a father and husband who sticks around in the tough times and always strives to provide for his family no matter what.

Jazmine or Jazzy or Jaz or Dora and at times chunk. She is a lovey dovey mushy gushy little girl with a very strong presence of Tough girl. She loves hugs and kisses and being called a princess and beautiful, but if you touch that toy she was just playing with we are going to have issues! She is a joy in my life! Mind you we work a lot with her on playing nicely with other kids but its not rare for her to come home with a scratch on her eye, cheek or nose from being bit, hit, scratched, or something else little kids do when she takes their toys from them! Yes, my Jazzy can be a bully... But you would never guess it by the way she loves to love. My little Diva, i pray that when she goes home she will remember to love and forget hate. That she will grow with GOD and change lives by her strong heart!

Last but certainly not least Ariel. We dont really have any nicknames for her; believe me we tried but none came out right :) She is our little character. No one can change moods as fast as she does! Its incredible... Sometimes ;) What i love about Ariel is her joy. She has this smile that will take your breath away! She also has these little joy attacks where she laughs historically at nothing or she gets so excited to see you that she squeezes your neck as tight as she can... And that girl is strong! :) She is our Joy box :) My prayer for her is that she wont lose it. That she will carry around her Joy and dish it out among everyone she comes in contact with. Believe me its contagious.

GOD has great things for my baby sibs and i have faith that he will provide opportunities for them to live it out!

We also went to Cabo right after Thanksgiving which was FANTASTIC if i do say so myself. I had so much fun hanging out with my family and relaxing by the beach! It was also very eventful and busy. I loved every minute of it! Here are a few pics of our trip... We had themed Dinner parties every night but one, We went to the famous rock scene of Cabo San Lucas. Lovers beach and Divorce beach, Snorkling, Whale Watching, Ziplining, My mom and sister swam with Dolphins, I went parasailing which was awesome! Each day was very eventful and awesome! :) It was the best family vacation everrrr

Then After Christmas for my Dads birthday and New years my grandparents and cousins were in town! We had a blast. We unlike Cabo stayed at home a lot and just hung out as a family. We did a lot of painting and believe it or not i painted two pics... The first was not bad considering it was my first painting, i was much happier with the second! :) But one of the days me and my beautiful Twin cousins and lovely younger sister went to the Mariot hotel and took pics :) Here is a look at how those turned out!

On New years day we went to Starbucks after pics and took John Wayne Shots... We were up most of the night... And we had a lot of energy :)

Now i have very exciting news! I move out on my own with my soon to be sister in law February 1st. I am very excited about it :) Ill post details and pics as i have them :)

Cabo San Lucas

2010-12-13T18:55:00.000-08:00

A week ago yesterday my family returned from Cabo San Lucas Mexico where we spent 6 days sulking in the sweet sunlight and getting pampered hand and foot. It was absolutely incredible! Most mornings i woke up to see the sunrise out our window over the calm beautiful sea. We would get our morning outfits on and head downstairs for a buffet style breakfast with an omelet station on the side. Over the course of the 6 days I went Zip lining, Hand-gliding, an RV tour of the mountains, Whale watching, Snorkeling, Site seeing and a little bit of shopping. We were constantly on the move going on an excursion, meeting our Tennessee friends at the pool or getting ready for our dinner dates. It was the best vacation i have ever been on! We met some really great people who i am glad to say will be our friends for years to come. I keep waking up and hoping that when i look out the window i will see the Sunrise over the ocean! :) It is yet to happen, but i have faith! Miracles do happen ya know!

When we were on a speed boat going whale watching and snorkeling we saw jumping sting rays. It was one of the coolest things ive ever seen! I did not have any idea they were so active. But sure enough they were flying out of the water and got some air in the process! They looked like they are flapping their wings :)

Overall it was a fantastic trip!

In other news... I will most likely be moving out with my brothers girlfriend Amber soon. We may sign a 6th month lease on Friday or Saturday. Scary but exciting.

Halloween/Child care

2010-11-01T12:43:00.000-07:00

Halloween was awesome. The kiddos were so cute. Emma was a Candy Corn witch. CJ was Bumblebee the Transformer. Jazmine was a pink Kitty cat! And Ariel was a Cow :) I was purple grapes and Alissa was Green grapes. It was epic :) I took a picture on my phone so i am going to try to email it to myself and post pictures. Though i didnt get to go tricker treating with the kids, i did get to go to a College group outreach thing at Julie Beths house. It was uber fun and i am proud to say that i kicked butt at Zombie brains or something like that (It was a dice game we played.)

Today however was a bittersweet kinda day. We enrolled Jazzie and Ariel in a Christian Day School. They will be going Mon-Fri from 8-4pm... The reason was not because we didnt want them in the house or anything like that. We did it because they are definitely going home in a few months and as of right now my mom and i are VERY attached to the girls and they are VERY attached to us. Our thinking was that they would slowly detach from us and learn social skills, but more so that we would be able to begin our emotional transition into saying goodbye. It is so complicated and i cant really put to words what i am feeling because to be honest i am a little confused. But what i can say is that even though i have been thinking about the girls all day wondering if they are ok and if they like it, this day school is the best for them!

Ill post some pics of the kids in their costumes once i upload them to my computer! :)
Blessings <3

3 Months

2010-10-27T18:22:00.000-07:00

3 Months ago today we received a very precious gift at our doorstep. My lovely foster brother and sisters. In the past three months we have seen Jazzie turn 2 and steal our hearts by her sassy personality and major attitude :) We have watched as Ariel went from Crawling to walking all over the place to saying her first word (Buh Bye... SO CUTE) and we even got to share her first birthday with her. Now friday we will be celebrating CJ's 7th birthday. Each day has brought its own challenges. Its own frustration and sometimes tears. My family saying we are so grateful for this entire fostering experience to cursing it because of the heartache that is inevitable and that seems to haunt each day. The thought of saying goodbye is bittersweet. I hate to say that i miss our old life because of how incredibly selfish that is... But if I'm honest i do. I miss being able to randomly go out to a movie or stay at a restaurant and talk for 4 hours with my family just because. We cant do a lot of the things we used to because of the new additions. And while the thought of saying goodbye will mean our old life gets to come back, it has been tough trying to wrap my head around never seeing them again. I've been fighting the lies that their futures are basically going down the drain because of the life they are going back to. Satan won't leave me alone. And its pissing me off! Because i know in my heart of hearts that GOD will take care of my brother and sisters. They have been predestined to fulfill a purpose in this life just like i have. They are his children just like i am. And he loves them so unconditionally. He has never left me, and he will never leave them.

So i will proclaim. And anyone reading this please proclaim with me... SATAN CAN SHOVE IT!!! GOD HAS MY FOSTER SIBLINGS IN HIS HANDS AND THEY WILL BE OKAY!

I'll just miss waking up and taking care of my little sisters. Ill miss walking in to get Jazzie in the morning and seeing the excitement on her face that i remembered to come get her out of bed. Ill miss the battle that is brushing her teeth every morning! Ill miss her never ending questions of wheres Emlay (Emily) or where CJ is or wheres Amber or Eneck (Derek). Ill miss being called Bernie. And though it may sound nasty ill miss hearing her scream I DID IT at the top of her lunges when she goes potty on the toilet. She is my little buddy... Thinking of her leaving makes my days seem pretty boring.

And of course Ariel brings much laughter. Her many faces and noises and grunts that you never thought a baby could produce... Boy she really does impress you! She is our curious bug and she looks like Mogley from Jungle Book... Ill miss my mogley!

Even though with CJ we have had the most battles and frustration and heartache, he is the sweetest little boy and he has a heart of Gold! He is so thirsty for love, yet he dishes it out freely! Ill miss his unexpected kindness. One minute he is totally ignoring you and breaking some rule and the next he is running to you giving you a hug and saying "Bwittney i love you forever. All day!"
(He has a major speech impediment... Hints the broken english!)

I love them. And will miss them. But it'll be ok, because the King of Kings is watching over them!
Im a mess. Please pray for me and my family!

365 days!

2010-10-21T12:52:00.000-07:00

A year ago today i made a promise to GOD that i would be single for a year! In that particular time in my life i was dealing with heartache from a recent breakup from the first boyfriend i ever had. I was lonely and felt like there were absolutely no answers to why these unfortunate events were occurring right on top of each other. I decided (More like GOD told me to and i listened) that the stress of relationships with boys was a hinderance more than a blessing and i needed some time off. At the beginning i didn't know if i would be able to do it, and i even asked GOD stupid questions like... Well what if my future husband comes along and wants to be with me while i am taking this vow of singleness for a whole year?! Just a side note, i am daily astounded by the amount of Grace GOD gives me each day of my life... especially when i am exceptionally stupid :)

It wasn't until about a month or so ago that the main question i had over this past year was answered. The big "WHY?" To be honest the answer was simple... GOD wanted me to recognize that he is the only relationship i will ever have that will not fail. He is the only one who will always love me and be there for me in every situation. And more than anything, he wanted me to know that no matter what status i have in this world, i am deeply and unconditionally loved. I have heard it said to me before by pastors, small group leaders, even friends... But i wasn't ready to receive it! And to be honest i didn't believe it until now! GOD has allowed me to be receptive to feelings i have never experienced. To see things from different perspectives and to approach relationships in a different way.

I wont ever say that i have learned how to manage and carry out a perfect relationship. Because there aint no way I could ever perform such a high task! :) But GOD has instilled in me a new confidence and reassurance that when he is in control of my heart, the relationships he gives me will prosper. And i believe my future is in such great hands! I feel such peace and comfort knowing that i do not and will not ever have to worry about my future.

GODs got my back :)

Carrie, Billy and a whole lot of FUN!

2010-10-08T16:10:00.000-07:00

Trying out a life group tonight. I am pretty excited about it! Praying this goes well :)

Went to Carrie Underwood last night with my (hopefully soon to be sister in law) Amber. We had SO MUCH FUN!!!! :) Billy Currington opened the night and was fantastic :) It was as if i was listening to the radio while looking at an extremely cute scruffy cowboy singing! He's super cute... But 37 (Yes i looked it up) is a little old for me. So anyways, if he is ever in your town i would highly suggest seeing him because he is GREAT!

Then Carrie came out. Her and her classy beautiful self tore that stage apart swinging in swings, rising high on the stage, standing in the bed of a flying blue truck, belting great songs and then belting some more! She was strong and amazing the entire 2 hours! We had an amazing time and i loved it!

Afterwards Amber even bought me a shirt secretly... I told her not to.. and then she ran without me knowing and purchased it! I love her :) And so i have been proudly walking around in my Carrie Underwood Play On tour T-Shirt and cowboy boots!

Also did a diet with my mom and dad... Lost 9 pounds... Feel GREAT! I can fit in the 7 jeans that my mom bought me at Christmas last year for the first time :) So i am wearing those today as well! :)

Ill leave with a quote from Billy... GOD is Great, Beer is Good, and Women are Crazy :)

Blessings <3

2 Months

2010-09-28T11:35:00.001-07:00

Yesterday we celebrated our 2 month mark for having the kiddos. It has been quite the experience... Here are some things i have learned from having them with us.

The Foster system is extremely heartbreaking to be apart of, but also very rewarding
I love kids
I need more patience
Diapers smell... Especially Jazmines
Little boys have 7 energizer bunnies living in them... and they never go out of batteries :)
Never judge a kid by their appearance. They will surprise you
Dont make the baby angry... She can make your life miserable.
To go with the previous, Dont spoil babies... otherwise they are no fun to be around
Ive come to cherish nap time
GOD reveals himself through children in the most unusual ways
I dont want to see these kids go
Its hard to have other people living in your house... But totally worth the struggle
A lot of progress can happen in 2 months
Cant wait to see what month 3 brings :)

This is one of those experiences where i have felt so Overwhelmed and stressed and frustrated and pissed off but at the same time i have seen attitude changes in these kids and have been so blessed by their sweet hearts! Its the little things like watching them fold their hands to pray before Dinner, or running up to me giving me a hug, or telling me they love me that makes it all worth it! :)

Wish i could show you their sweet faces! :) You'll just have to take my word for it that they are stinkin cuteeeee!!!

Verse Book & Encouragement

2010-09-20T10:55:00.000-07:00

A few years back for my birthday my Aunt Christy sent me this journal that is very beautiful on the outside i think :) Anyways on the front of this book it has a pinkish flower and on top of the stem of the flower are 6 words:

Inspire

Dream

Hope

Believe

Imagine

Create

Immediately i fell in love with it and wanted to do something different with it than an ordinary journal... So i made it my Verse Book. My goal is to fill the entire book Cover to Cover with Verses that i have been inspired by, or that others have been inspired by. So far there is at least 1 verse on every page. And i am currently working page to page filling it completely before moving on. My hope for this book is to find encouragement through it and give encouragement to others as well... That is why, once it is completely filled i want to give it away to someone that i don't know.

The words in the Bible have been such a blessing to me and have shown so much truth, love, restoration, hope, and peace. So i wanted to share a verse with you today that really caught my attention today, and i hope will be an encouragement to you where ever you may be at in your life.

Psalm 91

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High

will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

I will say of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress,

my GOD, in whom I trust."

Surely he will save you from the fowler's snare

and from the deadly pestilence.

He will cover you with his feathers,

and under his wings you will find refuge;

his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

You will not fear the terror of night,

nor the arrow that flies by day,

nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,

nor the plague that destroys at midday.

A thousand may fall at your side

ten thousand at your right hand,

but it will not come near you.

You will only observe with your eyes

and see the punishment of the wicked.

If you make the Most High your dwelling--

even the LORD, who is my refuge-

then no harm will befall you,

no disaster will come near your tent.

For he will command his angels concerning you

to guard you in all your ways;

they will lift you up in their hands,

so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.

You will tread upon the lion and the cobra;

you will trample the great lion and the serpent.

"Because he loves me," says the LORD, "I will rescue him;

I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.

He will call upon me, and i will answer him;

I will be with him in trouble,

I will deliver him and honor him.

With long life will I satisfy him

and show him my salvation.

No matter where you are at, what is going on, or how hopeless you feel. We have a GOD that loves us and will deliver us from any situation. He longs to sit with us in the midst of turmoil and comfort us as he carries us through the tough times. We have ever reason to shout his name at the top of our lungs for how great and mighty our GOD is!!

From a song by Chris Tomlin... "And if our GOD is for us, then who can ever stop us. And if our GOD is with us, then what can stand against?!"

Lets lift him up today :)

Be Blessed

Ouch...

2010-09-16T13:02:00.000-07:00

My evil step sister is in town, and she is causing me serious pain right about now...

But my Linen dress for our family vaca to Cobo in December came in the mail today! :) Uber excited for our little trip to Mexico.

So that makes the pain a little better

Well, i am tired of being on the computer. Hasta la Pasta

Prayer Night

2010-09-15T13:14:00.000-07:00

Tonight is the 2nd of 3 prayer nights at Rivercity, and i am looking forward to tonight a lot!

Last night at College Group i really got to thinking about how i should pray more and seek the Lord more in Fasting and silence and stuff, It is just remembering and not putting it off to the side that has been my problem lately. Ya see, i dont know what happened to me once i graduated but for some reason, i used to have a really good memory and always remember everything! But now, i seem to be forgetting things ALL THE TIME! It is so frustrating, i am 19 and should not be losing my mind this early! i dont think thats normal! :)

Anywho, i am excited because i am going to have at least an hour that is 100% uninterrupted time with GOD, listening and praising him for all that he has done for me lately!! I know that he has some pretty amazing plans for me, i just dont know what they are! So tonight i am hoping to get a hint at what and where he wants me to go with my life so i can start to focus on what i need to do to better prepare myself for the upcoming exciting events in my life!!

Fostering is going AMAZING! CJ my little broseph has been praying at dinner these past few nights so that has been very cool to see GOD working in his life, it has been encouraging in that sense, so lately i have been very pumped!

GOD IS GREAT!!!!! :)

Bring on the Rain!!!!

2010-09-07T12:49:00.001-07:00

Hermine has officially shed some major tantrums over Texas today. This is one upset little lady let me tell you... Just when you think she has simmered down and gotten over it, oh boy she lets out a wail!

I had to work today... My job is cleaning pools for my dads pool company, I am proud to say that i went out and cleaned those pools today in the buckets of water Hermine was letting loose. I was soaking wet and even brought a change in clothes... Those dry clothes lasted a total of 10 min and then i had 2 sets of drenched attire. I will say it made my job a little more interesting today. I am grateful that i was able to go out today and get those pools over with for the week. GOD was good to me today!

So far it has been a wet wonderful day :)

Be praying though, we have a leak in our ceiling by our front window due to the extreme weather. The winds have been blowing like crazy making the vast amounts of water smack against our house in every direction!

In other news, my dad just informed my mamma and I that he ordered a truck load of boulders... Interesting i know... BUT... it is actually very exciting because that means that we are going to begin the digging process of our pool in our backyard... For those of you who dont know, my Dad owns a pool company that employs me called Fossil Creek Pools... We have owned it since 2007 and have not had a pool since he opened the business. Sad that the pool owner has no pool! BUT THAT IS ABOUT TO CHANGE!!!! Wooop!!! Maybe my dad will hire me to clean our pool too...

Then again, i dont know if i want that kind of pressure! hehe!! ;)

Blessings and Safety through this crazy weather!

If I Die Young

2010-09-03T10:27:00.000-07:00

There is a really awesome song that i love called If i Die Young by the Band Perry. Anyways, i was looking up the music video and stuff of this song and i stumbled across the explanation behind this song... Basically the song is about reflecting on their lives and a declaration from them saying, if we were to die right now we would be very happy with all the things we got accomplished.

So it made me think... If i was to die right now, would i be happy with everything i did/didn't accomplish in my life?

I know that in my life i have no regrets. Because everything that has happened in my life has been significant in getting me where i am today. Of course i wish i was better at reading my Bible and praying and serving GOD with all that i am, But every time i screwed up on those things i learned from them...

The topic 'Death' is not necessarily a fun happy go lucky topic to dwell on, but i think sometimes it is a good thing to think about just to prepare for it. I've thought about it and think it is something to rejoice over... I mean, that is the day we will meet our Almighty Father face to face! The word Death has become so painful to hear and think about, when in all reality it is something that does not need to be feared for followers of Christ. Our future has been foreseen, We have been promised paradise and paradise is what we will receive.

So whether i have 50 minutes, 50 days or 50 years left in my life i am choosing to live out each moment to the fullest and the embrace the pain and joy that awaits me. I know that my life has a purpose, though i don't know what that purpose is, i know it is going to be pretty awesome! I am choosing to give all reigns to GOD...

"I have been crucified with Christ, and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and delivered Himself up for me..." (Galatians 2:19-20).

Fall Semester

2010-08-26T07:34:00.000-07:00

So... I decided to be a little daring and take a Flex course this fall for my final core class English Comp 2... A flex course is a course that is finished in half the amount of time it takes a regular semester to end. A normal semester is 16 weeks, Flex obviously is 8 weeks... Boy was that a mistake! eekkk

First there was the technical difficulties of the course, for some reason my class does not come up on Macbooks, of course i didnt know that until yesterday and the course started monday! But its ok i got it worked out and now have access to my class....

Then there was the first assignment! And one would think that because it is only an 8 week class that the teacher would condense the amount of work to be reasonable for an 8 week period.... OH NO... NO NO NO! My professor obviously wants to make sure that we are reading every bit of material that is in the regular course.

My first bit of homework is to read the first 12 chapters of my Text book... Plus 15 short stories.

Oh, did i mention i dont have my text book yet! I ordered it Monday... I have a test over the material Saturday! I am able to read some of the short stories that are posted online, but as far as the 12 chapters i am suppose to read in the text book, im thinking this first test is probably not going to be my best!

Ohhhhhh boy!!!

School Time Structure.

2010-08-23T11:22:00.000-07:00

Today has been uber relaxing. The kiddos went left for school at 7:20ish, the babies didnt wake up until closer to 8. And since they have been up other than the sound of an unhappy baby it has been pretty quiet... Especially now since they are both napping! :)

I may only be 19... But i have come to love the little bits of me time that i am able to get. And lately i have become more fond of silence! There is something so refreshing about listening to nothing.... just quiet!

I have come to the conclusion that this year is going to be very good for all of us. Not only in creating structure for the girls and CJ to learn from, but also as a family to not go completely insane feeling the need to be entertaining 24/7.... Oh and exciting news...

My mom got an email from CJ's teacher and she said that he was doing very good his first day. That he was excited to be at school and learn! :) We were very pleased to hear that!

Im off to go fold and pick up the house.

New School Year!

2010-08-22T21:11:00.000-07:00

Emma my baby sister is going to be attending her first day of 5th grade... Which is the last day of Elementary school in Texas. :( I am pretty much a wreck... Definitely not ok with her getting so big!

And CJ my little bro is going into 1st grade which i am really excited for him to go and grow! But am also a bit nervous about little punks who feel the need to bully people who are different.

If your prayers could be for Emma and CJ this week i am sure they will be blessed by it!

Wish i could post pics of our angels... Imagine them beautiful haha

2010-08-20T20:49:00.000-07:00

No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.

Hebrews 12:11

I love the simplicity of this truth.

GO GOD!!!

Why Jesus?!

2010-08-18T19:53:00.000-07:00

To start... Major Praise.... I PASSED MATH!!! :) Even though it was the only D i have ever received in school in my life, i passed... Because a D can be passing in College so what the heck ILL TAKE IT!!! :) WOO HOO!!! I think it is soooo funny when little things like this happen to test faith in GOD. I mean, here i am flipping out over a stupid summer school math class... Seriously... Math! I was about to let in consume my emotions and destroy a couple of beautiful days because i did bad on tests, when GOD was right there the entire time screaming in my face "Dude, chill out! I will take care of you and everything is going to be ok!" So after a few almost cry sessions, after i got over the stupidity of wanting to cry over a math test my days turned out to be fantastic! I see now why he never allowed me to shed a tear over that class... Because even though i barely squeezed by with a passing grade, it was passing... And in all reality that is all i care about when it comes to school! All that to say i passed... I talk to much!

Now on to important things... I have been listening to Klove (if you dont like klove you can zip your lip because i think they are awesome!) like crazyyyy for a while now because i am in my car so much. Anywhooo they are asking a question right now that kind of caught me off guard because it is not necessarily one i think about everyday. If you had to give a 30 second answer on Why you Chose Jesus; what would you say?

So i am actually very curious to know... I will ask you...

WHY JESUS?

Living, School.... Being Patient and Trusting

2010-08-10T13:22:00.000-07:00

OHHHHH BOYYY!!!!!!! Yesterday I took my College Algebra Final for my second session of online summer school that i am taking... And, Well, I had to make a 71 i think, i was shooting for a 86 but i think i will be okay with a 71. I know that is a big leap but i am more than okay with slimming close to the edges when it comes to schooling. Anyways, i have no idea how i did... I am trying my best to stay positive but there is that little voice in the back of my head that LOVES to jump in and fill me with distrust and doubt. Ya see, GOD has promised me that he will provide for me... And that everything is going to be okay. So i have given myself no choice but to believe it! But at the same time me being imperfect and human and all there is that little pinch of insecurity! I hate it, but i wont lie and say it isn't there. Anywho, please be prayin' for me in that area, as i am trusting in the LORD and remaining confident in him. That is something that has been a little tough for me lately is remaining confident not in myself but in GOD.

Back to more interesting things.... Fostering has been going great, we all absolutely love these kids and are very glad they are in our home. Even though there is frustration at times and feelings of being extremely tired to on the edge of going insane, I know with my entire being that these kids are suppose to be in our home. GOD has proven that time and time again and it is honestly the only thing i can cling to at times. Ariel our little baby who will be 10 months in a week has been very fond of screaming her head off every opportunity she can get! At times i feel like that crazy guy on the side of the road that stares off into the distance but in all reality is looking at nothing in particular, with his hair looking like he just got struck by lightning and smells like poop. After being stuck with a screaming baby for 30 min straight that guy doesn't seem so crazy to me anymore! :) haha

Being carried away with all the negativity is very easy for me to do, but for some reason i have not once been able to forget that GOD has a purpose for my family... That he has a purpose for these kids, and that he is using my house to help that purpose happen! It is truly spectacular to think about 3 more souls being saved for eternity just because they lived in our house for X amount of time! That is my strong hold! The amazing promises that GOD keeps reminding me! :)

I wish i could post pics of our angels! But unfortunately for their safety we are not aloud to.

Please keep praying for my family as we continue our new journey and for me and my schooling. I should be done with my core stuff by october if i pass my math class! :)

Lots of Love!

1 Week Later...

2010-08-03T10:48:00.000-07:00

We have had our new additions for 1 week so far and despite the overwhelming moments of having 2 babies pooping, crying and moaning the experience is going pretty good so far. Turns out the older two kiddos are a year younger than we though they were. CJ is 6 turning 7 and Jaz is 1 turning 2 while Ariel is 9 months. It has only been 7 days and already these kids have made a bond with each of us and has implanted a soft spot in our hearts as well! We love these kids! It is pretty crazy to think that we could have them for 4 months minimum and anything longer than that is unknown! Surprisingly the hectic and constant changes in our daily schedules has not been near as stressful as i thought it would be. Of course the first two days adjusting to the new bodies in our home got pretty emotional at times, but after we established a routine for them things have began to shine a little brighter.

It is inevitable for us to encounter trials and heartache because of this process. But i can already see that the blessings far outweigh the negative things that happen. And though the blessings may be few and far between at times, they are the things we have been holding on to! Already i can see changes in these kids, but more importantly i see major changes in my family! My mom deserves a HOSS award, she has unleashed a wonder woman from within her that i have never seen before. My dad has taken special interest in these kids and has been fantastic at showing these kids a positive male influential role that they have never seen! It is so cute to see how CJ latches onto my dad and is awestruck by him... He calls my parents mom and dad... Heartbreaking, but so sweet at the same time! My brother met them for the first time Sunday and he is such a wimp when it comes to babies... He fell in love with the little ones and was a GREAT big brother to CJ, teaching him to swim and playing legos with him. And then there is my baby sis Emma, I dont think she fully understood the task we signed up for but she has done far better with adjusting to these kids than i gave her credit for. She is more than willing to give up her "being the baby girl" role! I am so inspired by my family and their roles that they have played in impacting and loving on these kids.

If nothing else, i have seen how blessed i am to have a mom who is my best friend, a dad who is always willing to fight for me and love me, an amazing overprotective brother who can always make me smile and a sister who is always there for me! We have been blessed with an amazing placement! These kids fit perfectly with our family and i look forward to the rest of our time together. I hope it doesnt go by to fast! :)

Answered Prayers!!!

2010-07-22T11:07:00.000-07:00

My family is a registered Foster/Adopt family, as some of you may have known... And while we have had numerous calls with referrals for children to be placed in our home, for some reason every single one of them has fallen through. The first few calls were extremely emotionally draining because they tell us that it was an absolute, that those kids will be coming to live with us, and then a few hours later we get a call saying they either went back home to live with their parents(Which is a blessing... Sometimes) or that it was between us and another family and the case worker chose the other family... So we have had our fair share of almosts. But this week, while we are respiting 4 children(which we love them, they are the sweetest cutest kids!!) We got the news that we are going to be getting 3 little ones... Clifford-7, Jazmine-2 almost 3, and Ariel-9 months! They will be coming to live with us this coming Tuesday!

This entire process has been such an emotional roller coaster but i can say with all honesty that i am thrilled it wasnt a walk in the park! GOD totally did a work in me and my familys hearts. We HAD to have faith that he would provide for us and bring the right children in his perfect timing. So even though we got excited and then let down a few times, we always had his promise for us in the back of our minds. We knew that he was waiting to put the right children in our home!

I cannot wait to meet these precious babies!! :) Please pray for my family and for these kids, that they would not only fit well in our home but that they would come to know and Love the LORD as well! My hope and prayer for this whole experience is that GOD would use my family to speak to the kids he brings and that he would impact their lives forever!

I will definitely be writing come Tuesday to give an update on how the kids respond to their first day in their new home(new home for a while at least) :)

Bible Obsession....

2010-07-12T17:36:00.000-07:00

I have become addicted to collecting Bibles... Partly because it is the book of Truth and the book which i live by, but also because there are SO many different kinds of bibles i feel like i need them all!!! So as i was browsing on Bible gateway a few weeks ago i came across this bible that was a Hebrew, Greek and English bible! The old Testament was written in Hebrew so this bible has the literal translation with the actual Hebrew writing as well as the english on the side so you know what you are reading... The New Testament was written in Greek so it is the same with the Greek writing with the English translation along side it as well...

I could not control my fingers as they clicked Buy, and typed in my info to purchase it...

Well, i received it today and i was not expecting it to be so AWESOME!!!! But it is!!! :) I am soooo excited to dive into this one. I am planning on learning the Hebrew and Greek languages so this definitely makes me feel like i moving forward with that as well!!! It is the coolest Bible in the world! :)

Eclipse... Yes, Twilight!

2010-07-12T17:25:00.000-07:00

I am not a big reader... And i can say with no shame that i have not read any of the Twilight books and do not intend on reading them... I like to be different from what everyone else is doing so i feel like in order to be different i shouldnt read the books! :) But Today at 4 i went and saw (For the 2nd time i might add) Twilight Eclipse... By far, the best one of the entire series. Now, let me clarify that i do not think the actors in the movies are the best, nor do i think the script in the movies was very well written... But the overall plot of the entire show is soooooo intriguing to me! I CANT GET ENOUGH OF IT!!!! In the first two Twilight movies the script consisted of about 10 minutes dialogue throughout each movie so it kind of drove me crazy with the excess music and lack of communication between the characters... But THIS ONE has a whole bunch of communication, and you really get a chance to see Bella and Edward talk and as an audience member we get a sense that they really do love each other... In this movie i also grew a disgust for Jacob (A.K.A Werewolf man) and his werewolf possy.... Yes, i admit

I AM FOR TEAM EDWARD!!!!!!

Jacob's character reminds me of the Jerk Jock guy who thinks he is better than everyone else and is really upset when he doesnt get what he wants... One could relate him to a spoiled rotton little brat, or an annoying mosquito that bites you in 10 different places and now you cant stop itching yourself... I think anyone of those will suffice as a legit description of the Werewolf man...

While Edward on the other hand is a sweet cunning old fashioned stud (Especially in Eclipse) i will say in the first two it was more Edward's determination to protect and love Bella than his looks that drove me to fight for the Vampires... But in this one they did something different with his eyes and the editing his face so he is REALLYYYY cute!!! haha!!

On a scale of 1-10 1 being the worst this movie was a solid 8. Acting was like a 5 but there are enough good parts in the movie to make you want to keep watching. :) So my advice, if you havent seen it i highly recommend it!!

Accomplished!

2010-07-08T08:56:00.000-07:00

Its hard for me to believe that just over a month ago i began my first days of Summer Session 1 which i was enrolled in 3 classes. Today i am finished with those classes and am proud to say that i have passed them all!!! Not that i was overly concerned with passing Government 2302, Drama and P.E. (all of which were online classes) I still had that thought of in my head of the Possibility of not passing.... Well today i have shut that little voice out and feel very accomplished! What a productive summer this has been already! Now come Tuesday the 12th i begin my next set of classes over the summer. This time i am only taking 2 online classes, College Algebra which i am actually kind of excited about because i love algebra... sometimes... and Speech which i am pretty good at public speaking. So i am hopeful for these next two classes and am confident that i will do fine! I dont know why i felt inclined to share this info... it is not important but i was on a spur of joy that i am 1/2 way done with summer school, i just had to share! :)

The whole reason for all of this summer school and speediness to get done with my Associates Degree in a year and a half instead of two years was because of the Mission to Africa which i felt very strongly about at the beginning of this year. I set a goal for myself and said that i would not leave for Africa until i had my Core Completion done(which for a while i thought was the same as my associates... i was very wrong!) because i know myself and i have never been a big fan of school, so i knew i had to finish the first half of it before i left or i would most likely not go back to school. Anyways, i set this goal and i am proud to say that i have stuck with it and have almost accomplished this! Even though now i am not 100% on anything in my life anymore. I have no idea what GOD wants me to major in, what career if any GOD has in store for me, If i am every going to go to Africa to be a missionary... All these questions and concerns about my life and what GOD has in store for me, all these things are unanswered! And much to my surprise i am not freaking out at all!!!!

I think GOD has conquered major ground in my life. For once he has shut me up! Of course i still would like to know what he has in store for me, but i dont feel the need or even stress about getting the answer right away. Partially because i know he is not going to give it to me(i have been praying for patience and boyyyy has he given me ample opportunity to practice it) and also because it is kind of fun not knowing where GOD is going to put me. So this is where i stand on July 8, 2010... I Brittany Marie Brandner do not have any idea what GOD wants me to do, Where GOD wants me to go, Who GOD wants me with, or How GOD wants me to get there. And i am 100% OK with that! :)

Like i said earlier... I feel very accomplished :)

Terra Phelps!!! :) :) :) :)

2010-07-03T09:06:00.001-07:00

Today is a great day. Terra Phelps is coming back to Texas for about a week to come visit, and i am beyond myself so excited! :)

Terra has made such a difference in so many peoples lives, including mine. She was the woman that i looked to and she helped me find the most important person... GOD. For a good chunk of my High School she was the person that was keeping me in check! She told me the hard truth and though sometimes i didnt like to hear it, she loved me enough to say it anyways. Terra is Beautiful inside and out, she is a wonderful wife, mother, sister, friend and i call her family! I love love love love love love you Terra!!!!!!!!!

I dont tell you enough how awesome you are and how much i appreciate you... So this one is for you Terra!

I LOVE YOU

I APPRECIATE YOU!!!!

I hope one day to be as awesome as you are :)

RFKC

2010-06-29T14:49:00.000-07:00

Last week i went to a 6 day camp called Royal Family Kids Camp... Let me tell you, it was absolutely amazing! Everything about it! The facility, the kids, the food, personal AC units for each room... I mean, talk about high class!! :) It was by far the best camp i have ever been to. The kids were fantastic, and even though we had a few tantrums every here and there, the majority of my time with the kids was very enjoyable. Or course there was the goodbyes that tore my heart in two and let the flood gates loose... I was and still am very hopeful for each and every one of those kids though. GOD has been constantly reminding me and throughout the camp was constantly reminding me that even though those kids have been through Hell in their lives, GOD is still the same gigantic GOD that parted the Red Sea and saved Daniel from the fierce lions. He reminded me that he was and always will be with those kids as they grow up. I left that camp at peace because those kids just absorbed the truth of the gospel like sponges! It was AMAZING to see that! I was only support staff and going into it i was not sure how or if GOD would use me last week but immediately that thought was shunned from my mind as i began to watch all these little girls run up to me and give me hugs, and as they did motions during worship; they were so thirsty for love and not only that but for GODs grace! I was truly blessed to be apart of the whole camp and to share truth with some listening children. GOD is Beautiful and Awesome and Glorious! Always and Forever! :)

Please continue to pray for the Kids at RFKC!

Family Visits/Birthday Weekend

2010-06-12T15:24:00.000-07:00

Wednesday June 9th my dads parents and my cousins came to visit good ol' Texas! It has been a full year since i have seen them and to me that is far to long! Ohhhh how i missed them! This time it has been different though because we have a new house, new games to play, and thats about all i can think of thats different! :) Here is a little summary of our time with them so far. We just bought this game called Guesstures which is like me in a game! It is all about acting out words on a card before they fall down the hole and you lose the points. Sooooooooo, Who would have thought that playing that game with my Grandparents would be so much fun! It was the funniest thing i have seen in sooo long and full of laughter and memories that will last forever. It started with my Grandma in Round 1... She reached over to push the button that would start the timer, and before we knew it she had pushed the button and was making this horrible hissing meets getting bit by a vampire noise... As she pointed to her throat while making this wretched noise we all burst into laughter and started guessing.... CAT, CHOKING, ummmm..... DYING.... VAMPIRE, in the final seconds of the cards life someone yelled GARGLE.... Sure enough that horrible noise and her frantic pointing to her throat was Gargle. Then came Grandpa following after her. He had a few moments of pure embarrassment that will forever stand on his record. One of his cards was baby, It was his last card and he had been doing great the three other cards prior. He stood around and then began pacing the room saying "I have no idea what to do, Oh Geez, Oh no..." Then out of no were... BAM... His thumb went in his mouth and he began sucking on it! We all yelled BABY but by that time it was to late. The card had dropped and his turn was over. Then in another round he got the cards Air, Mistletoe and Dizzy. For Air he put his hands out to his side as wide as possible and began to what looked like kiss the air in different spots each time, Lets just say No one got what he was trying to do. For mistletoe he put his hand above his head and looked up at it, then he puckered up as far as his lips would go, Someone called out his card but it dropped to fast. And then Dizzy... He went on to do a tribal looking dance in circles and as we all laughed someone figured it out and we got the points. Lets just say i will forever remember that night! The rest of the time we have been hanging out, painting rocks, going shopping, eating really good food that is extremely high in carbs, late night swimming and working out til the wee hours of the morning. It has been a fantastic few days that they have been with us and i look forward to the rest of it... Though i dont want it to end they have assured us they will be back for Christmas time! :) YAY!!!

Oh... And i turn 19 tomorrow... EEK!!! :) I am blessed

Excitement followed by Sadness

2010-05-24T15:32:00.000-07:00

Sunday May 23 was a great/sad day all mixed together! It was great because of Royal Family Kids Camp which is a week long camp that is for foster kids! I am so excited to be going... I just feel God all over this and i know that he is going to do such amazing things! I cannot wait to go! It is less than a month away and i get the butterflies in my tummy just thinking about it! It is so great for me because i have never done anything like it before and so it will be completely new and fresh! I am doing what i do best Drama :) and i am helping with worship which is cool. There is a chance i could be a councilor but that is uncertain at this time. Either way Gods will will be done and it will be incredible!!!

But... At 5:30pm May 23 the finally of my all time favorite series "Lost" played on the TV screen for the last time! Though i was spending time with my family last night so i watched it today.. But still! Its over. I will forever remember the years of suspense and unanswered questions and pure frustration at that show. All of those questions have been answered(I think... that show made a lot!) now i am just sad that i wont have anything TV wise to look forward to every week. Other than dancing with the stars... GO ERIN AND MAKS!!!!

Now to ask a huge favor... Please be apart of the RFKC prayer team! This camp is so important especially for the kids we are targeting and so prayer is a huge tool that i know God will listen to and answer. None of this would be possible without Gods help so we want to continue to ask for it in everything. May his will be done at RFKC this year! AMEN!

Shrek the Final Chapter

2010-05-22T05:49:00.000-07:00

Yesterday at 1:50pm my friend Alissa went with me to see my favorite series of movies in the whole world! Yes... Shrek... And i might add that it was absolutely fantastic! :) I highly recommend seeing it with Kids, and if you might fancy Shrek then see it with older people! It was very cute in a romantic way, Pretty funny at certain parts, and highly entertaining the whole way through. Of course this is coming from me, i am obsessed with Shrek! There is just something about the greenness and his Irish/Scottish accent that makes me go crazy!

Needless to say it was a beautiful end to the Shrek adventure and i look forward to buying the movie when it comes out along with any adult T-Shirts, Bowling balls, figurines Etc... that they decide to attach to this :)

First experience with Respite

2010-05-17T10:40:00.000-07:00

The weekend came to a sad close Sunday night when we had to say goodbye to the 4 kids we got to hang out with for the weekend. But overall we had a great time. We had two teenage girls and then two precious little boys. There was quite a range between the ages of the girls and the boys but it gave us a huge advantage going into Fostering come June 17th because now we can really build our experience on how to treat the different ages, races, and personalities. I will admit at first with the older girls i was intimidated by the lack of excitement in staying with us for the weekend. Then i have to keep reminding myself that this isn't a fun thing for the kids coming to stay with us, while it may be fun for us it is not a vacation for them. It turned out to be great with the girls though. Saturday i took them to a movie, we saw The Back-Up Plan with J-Lo and it was actually really cute. The male lead in that movie had pretty corny lines that i am fairly certain no man would say in real life but thats okay. At least i didn't leave wishing i would have a guy like that, which if you know me at all is saying A WHOLE LOT! :) I had to house sit for some folks Saturday night so i wasn't with them that night but we hung out Sunday when i got home from church and i was very glad to get the extra time with them. From the looks of it saying goodbye is going to break our hearts... But all the time we get to spend with them is priceless!

Prayers are still appreciated as we continue this journey!

Paul Coleman and the Rivercity Rollers :)

2010-05-16T11:30:00.000-07:00

Today was an exciting day at Rivercity Community Church because Paul Coleman(Yes the same Paul Coleman who toured with the Newsboys and who is the leader of the Paul Coleman Trio) visited our church today and blessed us with the Amazing opportunity of playing with him and worshiping with him as well. It was a great time and i feel blessed listening to him open up his heart to us about where he is right now in Life, Faith and Career. Though i am fairly certain he thinks i am a creeper and most likely assumes that i will become the crazy stalker groopie... I assure you for his sake... I will not! :) OK... So i am up on the rotation for the worship team this week to be a backing vocalist with Natalie! I get an email earlier this week warning me in advance of the presence of a famous person accumpaning us on stage! So already i am stoked right!! I mean, its not everyday you meet a famous person, and well, i have never met a famous person(and now i kind of understand why that is a good thing!) So i walk in 7am to pre-service practice and i come through the doors to find... No famous person... Then, we start practice and get through a few songs. Take note that every person walking through the doors i am analyzing going through the same script with each on "Have i ever seen you before in my life?" if no then "STOP WALKING THROUGH THE DOORS I AM WAITING TO SEE A FAMOUS PERSON!" I also realize that this is not a good mind set to be in and that every person walking through those doors is a beloved child of GOD! That realization of course slipped my mind as i was in a frenzy waiting for Paul Coleman the Magnificent to arrive :)

Then, all of asuden the doors swing open and the sound of angels begin singing and an out of the ordinary ray of sunlight is beaming on this mysterious man and his right hand man as he walked through the door...(Not really, but that would have been totally awesome!) I then begin to sweat like a fat country man sitting in his rocking chair in the middle of summer. Not only that but this stupid grin grows on my face as my tongue forms the words "IS THAT THE FAMOUS GUY!!! IS HE HERE?!?!?!" Oh it was him indeed... Sazzo(Sean Azzaro) then began to reprimand me saying "You cant do that, dont say anything, Brittany stop it!" Sazzo then takes it into his own hands and brings good ol' Paul into the loop about my stupidness and Paul reacts by looking at me and saying "Aw she's cute" With those three words my shame was ignited! I then began to get so excited that tears started forming in my eyes... Like i couldnt speak, breath, and the only movement i could make was jumping up and down like a 4 year old does when they see santa. Praise the LORD i was able to control myself and turn around so he did not see my cry and i was actually able to stop myself from allowing them to roll down my helpless little face.

Needless to say i have forever scared poor Paul Coleman from every wanting to return and sing with the Rivercity Rollers(His band name for us) ever again.... I pray that one day enough therapy will help him to stop having nightmares about this crazy girl in a purple dress and cowboy boots from stalking him.

In all seriousness i will add that he does have a fantastic heart and GOD really used him to share some amazing stuff with us this morning. I was privileged to be able to sit and listen to new songs and to hear a musicians heart.

Husband, Comforter, Healer, Forgiver, Savior, Creator...

2010-05-13T21:35:00.000-07:00

Ya know those songs that give you the chills. Or that speak to you so deeply its as if it was written just for you... Well, i have been hearing song after song where i feel this way. God is just so good that way! He is always there to remind me that i am not alone. Even when i was going through that dry period in my life a few weeks ago where i felt so alone, he still came to me and i know he will never leave me! No matter what i do he will always love me and focus on my well being. Seriously, he is the PERFECT guy... I often chuckle at the thought of just running away with GOD, kind of like one of those typical chick flicks... I mean he says in the Bible that he is our Husband, Comforter, Healer, Creator, King, LORD, Everything we would ever need. I know for me i rarely give him credit for being any of those things in my life. Its so bad, but true. But for a little while now i have been focusing on him being my Husband (haha) and what that really means. I am totally not thinking of it in a creepy way. But really he is the only perfect guy. The only one that wont break up with you because you have a dry or boring personality, or because you wont cross boundaries, or because you arent what he is looking for. He never runs away with some lame excuse claiming that "Its not you, its me" Not once will he ever do that. He is the only boy who is always there, Always loving me, Always comforting me, and there are times in my day when i forget he is there! I MEAN SERIOUSLY! What is wrong with me?! Hello... Man of my dreams staring at me in the face 24/7 and I, Brittany Marie Brandner who obsesses over my future most of the time, who has planned the majority of my wedding with the only parts missing being the venue and the guy, who often worries that i will die an old maid if im not married by the time im 20, ME I have the Perfect guy, The guy from all the beautiful love stories that i have day dreamed over... I have that guy (Only better because he is perfect... literally perfect) And i forget he is there sometimes.

But the amazing thing is, is that even when i forget at times to think about him or to thank him, He still looks at me like i am the only on the face of the earth. He looks at me and sees me for who i really am. Not who the world wants me to be! He knows me and cares about me, not what i look like. The LORD above all chooses to love little ol' me everyday of my life. He calls me His, and gives himself to me!

"Crucified, laid behind a stone

You lived to die, Rejected and alone

Like a Rose, trampled on the ground

You took the fall, and thought of me... Above all!"

Gosh... I love that guy! :)

Foster/Adopting

2010-05-11T20:49:00.000-07:00

My family has undergone a series of classes and interviews and such for becoming a foster family for kids... Which it is so heartbreaking to hear of the great need for foster families... Anyways, we have finished everything that needed to be done to get ourselves and our home ready to start receiving some precious additions to our family! :) And i am VERY excited to announce that this friday night we will be getting our first set of kids... But let me say first that for about a month and a week we will only be doing what is called respite and what that is, is where we "babysit" other foster families kids while the parents go on a vacation or take a little break from fostering. The break usually consists of 2-4 days away. Anyways so we will only have this specific set of 4 children for 2 days :( a little bummed about that but excited that this is real and happening! I cannot wait to see how God uses our home and my family to show his love to these kids who have such a need for it! I just know that he has very unpredictable plans for us that will totally rock our world! If i can ask for prayer for my family and I as we undertake this new addition to our lives that would be so very appreciated! There is nothing like the power of prayer and i am a firm believer that God answers every prayer in his perfect timing! :) He answered ours... Now lets see where he leads us with this!

Unfortunately for privacy reasons i cannot post pictures of any of the kids we foster... But when we get them i will try my best to describe their beauty in words! :)

Happy Mothers Day!!!!

2010-05-09T14:42:00.001-07:00

To all the Moms out there i wish you a very Happy Mothers Day! And i hope that you realize how appreciated you are.

Lots of Love!

Britt

GOD IS AMAZING!!! :) :) :) :)

2010-05-06T21:25:00.000-07:00

Possibly the most amazing night of my life...

For the past month at least i have been in a dry patch in my faith, life everything. I didnt feel God like i used to. Nothing significant was changing in my life. I was stuck in a rut, and didnt seem to be leaving that little ditch anytime soon.... As i am driving home in my car from a fun night with Nat and Alissa I was blasting Jesus Cultures How He Loves... AKA my favorite song of all time! :) And i felt the urge to pray for my German sister Marie and her family who happen to be going through a very hard time right now, My very good friend Rachel who is also struggling with personal stuff, and the Miller family who recently lost their beloved Mother/Wife Cheryl Miller. So i am praying and all of asuden this abundance of awesomeness just slapped me in the face and filled my entire car and the air around it. It was absolutely indescribable. The presence of God was revealed to me tonight in my car!!! MY CAR IS LIKE MY FAVORITE PLACE NOW :) haha! And when i finished praying, which it was just my mouth moving... Honestly the words coming out of my mouth were not my own and could have only come from the Father... No lie it was him speaking! And the knowledge that i was in the presence of God and that he was using ME to speak for Marie, Rachel and the Miller Family at that time was so overwhelming i couldnt help by cry and laugh at the same time! Let me tell you my fellow drivers passing me got a little show as i was expressing my excitement! I dont know what i did to get in that rut... But i never want to go there again! Especially after tonight... I will not let his presence fade within my soul. Because i feel like i am complete again! And i havent felt this way in a while... in way to long!

I ask that you pray for me on this new journey that God has called me on which is yet to be revealed but i know its going to be awesome! Something is coming my direction and i guess ill just have to keep praising his holy name until it gets here! :) Pray for Marie Rachel and the Miller family too... But before i sign off and go to sleep... Can i pray for you? Comment prayer requests and ill add it to my daily prayers... If you dont have anything right now here is my number... the offer is open whenever :) 210-846-5649 Brittany Brandners prayer services are open anytime! :)

1 Year Complete

2010-05-05T20:47:00.000-07:00

I have just finished my last final... I took Chemistry and Humanities online today, one this morning and one just now. Whewwww i am spent from those! But i am stoked because i have successfully FINISHED MY FIRST YEAR OF COLLEGE!!!!! :) It feels soooo good to have completed this and to know that i worked my behind off to pass. Yes, i could have worked harder but the past is the past and i was able to finish an entire semester with more classes than i took last semester and not get stressed from school ONCE! Not one time did i flip a gasket and have an emotional breakdown!!! I am pretty excited to be finished though i know that the summer only brings more classes! Whatever, i am motivated right now to finish by early fall this year and have my Associates Degree in less than a year and a half! Needless to say i am very excited to see what the Summer classes will bring! :) :) :) :) God Bless

Lessons Learned

2010-05-04T09:43:00.000-07:00

Well... This is the week, the tests have been printed and are waiting anxiously for me to write my answers. Right or Wrong, Pass or Fail, The final Exams do not care... They just wait. And here i am freaking out about each and everyone like i always do. Test Anxiety is pouring throughout my entire being. I would throw up if i could... But that would be to normal... No, instead i step in someone else's freshly regurgitated lunch as i exit my car and begin my journey to my first final of the day. The test about monkeys and other ridiculous theories. At least the class is finally over! True story by the way... I did step in nasty throw up this morning! Now my shoe is releasing the awful stench of stomach fluid shrimp and other curious pieces of only God knows what that was lingering in that pile of nasty! Sorry for the detail, i want you to get the picture :)

Yesterday i took my History final and finished in 10 minutes... 50 questions and i feel very confident about it. Today i have Anthropology and Government. I completed Anthropology in about 50 minutes and feel ok about it. I think i passed which is really the only thing i care about! As long as i dont have to take it again i am perfectly fine! Now i have a few hours to burn while i wait and wait some more to take my Government test... I decided i would be a good blogger and share my feelings about life first. This week is the marking of a momentous event. My first year of College FINISHED!!!! And a few things i have learned are...

College is way better than High School
No one cares who you are, what your major is, why you are in college... Just stay out of their way and your good!
Dont take a Physical Anthropology class
Never take Chemistry online if you and science have never been friends... Which we havent
Be bold about your faith because they cant tell you to stop! WOOP!
Be nice to the kid in the Trench coat
Dont procrastinate cause then you fail!

Those are just a few. But still, i have learned things about myself and have grown in areas that i didn't know were there. I have a new sense of confidence in myself and honestly look forward to growing up! Some might say i am yet to do that and i would agree... kind of... But like everything else in my life it is a work in progress! Key word Progress! I am confident that God is going to use this last year for good and he is going to continue to shape me into the Woman he wants me to be. I am excited and Optimistic about life and the future! Thank you College, even though you are school and work that i think is pointless at times, i appreciate the discipline i have learned!

Now i really should start studying for my Government final... God Bless! :)

Time with The Grants

2010-05-02T12:30:00.000-07:00

Earlier this year i took on a nannying job with a Family, The Grants. They have 3 Beautiful and incredibly unique children Rachel 10, Timothy 5, and Nathaniel 3. Which if you dont know, Rachel their oldest was the whole reason i started this blog! She has Down Syndrome and we were first introduced about 3 years ago when i was her buddy at VBS. Anyway, so every week on Wednesday nights and Friday nights i would go to their house and hang out with these kids and boy was that Fun! I love kids and i love having fun so it was a perfect fit! :) In this experience i also was blessed to meet Ms. Cheryl Grant for the first time who is the hardworking inspiring mom of these three blessings! This last Friday April 30 however was my last night with them... My schedule is on the verge of piling back on top of me so i am not able to be with them twice a week. While it was sad and hard to say Goodbye, i was able to capture some "Picture Perfect" moments with the Kids and Ms. Grant! Enjoy :)

Rachel and Nathaniel Dancing with the Mariachi singers Nathaniel and IMs. Grant and ITimothy and that HUGE smile :)Nathaniel being Silly

Meet Rachel! She got Purple gum which turned her entire mouth Purple on the ride home :)

Timothy and his typical COOL DUDE face

And then the Baby of the Bunch Nathaniel.

I only got a few pics of them and didnt get a chance to snap one of Mr. Grant. But, they are an Amazing family with Amazing kids and it was a privilege to be able to hang out with them twice a week. :)

He will Carry Me....

2010-04-29T21:25:00.000-07:00

Hello All, Worst Blogger in the world here! :)

As life has been passing me by these past few weeks, months even, I have become very aware of the fact that i literally cannot do anything on my own. Seriously... Nothing. With me and all that is included in my life there always seems to be a catch, or something that must go wrong or unexpectedly. I dont know if everyone or anyone else has ever felt this way but its as if it goes wrong just because its me! If it was ANYONE else it would be peachy keen! But hello, I am Brittany Marie Brandner therefore, life isnt like the movies! I look around and i see my best friends in love and preparing for engagement or even weddings. I have watched people go away to colleges to work on their big degree, or move away to discover what the next adventure in their life is going to be. To put it plainly... I dont have that kind of excitement in my life right now.

I had applied to go on a year long mission in Africa with an organization called Operation Mobilization last October. Things with them are moving quite slowly so i am still not sure if i meet the standard of the kind of person they are looking for or however that whole thing works. I go to Community College and Northeast Lakeview College and am working on my Associates Degree. I should be done with that by October this year. I live at home, and rarely ever do anything on the weekends. My life is ordinary, plain and right now boring. I have entered into a cycle of motions that only seem to repeat themselves. I dont know what the future holds for me, whether God wills me to go on this mission, or to do something else i have no idea. I havent a clue on a lot of things lately...

The only thing i know is that God loves me. And he has a purpose for me and my life. Random lyrics from random Klove songs will pop in and out of my head sporadically. One of them has been He will Carry me, Love will hold us together, Like sunlight burning at midnight making my life something so beautiful, Mercy reaching to save me, Come as you are, Oh how he loves us! Songs of Hope and Love... I know this time of temporary boredom and confusion on what my next step is going to be will be done and gone in a blink of an eye. I hope i have opened up my heart and mind to be receptive to what God really is trying to show me in this time... Prayer is always appreciated! :)

Marie and Nora

2010-04-14T09:47:00.000-07:00

Here are some pics of My German sisters stay here in good ol' Texas :) Nora is the one with the dark hair and who is much taller... Marie is the other German :) hehe!

I wish i had taken more pictures while they were here are some of the pics from Wednesday when we went to Enchanted Rock and took pictures with the Wild Flowers :) Enjoy.....

When the First got here....

Dad... After hiking haha
Me and Emma in Flowers

Marie an I on one BIG rock!

Nora and Marie in the flowers

Emma and Dad... SO TIRED!

All of us in those pretty flowers! :) They smelt sooooooooo good! And there were SOOOO MANY! :) Looks like that all the rain Finally paid off !

German Sisters

2010-04-07T21:35:00.000-07:00

Marie and Nora are in town from Germany! It is so great having them here with us! I missed Marie so much, you never know how much you love someone until they aren't with you all the time and then you realize just how much you really did care. I also realized a great deal how much she was there for me and how much she did for me. But us being apart has been so great for our relationship, we have gotten so close and make sure to keep each other updated with our lives and what's going on and all that. It is as if she never left!

I got to meet Nora before this when i stopped in Germany going to the Ukraine, so now i just get the opportunity of getting to know her more. She is very sweet and funny! Her and Marie though they are twins are nothing alike... Food wise, whatever Marie likes Nora hates, whatever Nora likes Marie hates, with an exception to Double Stuffed Oreo's... They both share a love for that! So we got 3 packages so they could enjoy themselves... they don't have them in Germany... SO we are making sure they get their Oreo Fix!!! Nora has a high voice but a low laugh... Marie has a low voice and a high laugh. Nora is tall and Marie is Short. Noras hair is Dark while Marie's is light. Do you get my drift! They are NOTHING alike! But she is apart of the family too and i hope she gets a feel for that in her short lived trip to Texas.

Anyways, we are having a blast and will continue having so much fun until they leave Saturday! Today we went to Enchanted Rock which i had never been to before, that is one great work out! And SOOOO pretty! I loved it! After we went to this little steak place that is only open on wednesdays. That place is sooo cool! Very country with their little old man band and all you can eat appetizers and desert but only one steak per ticket you buy(Not the cheapest steak!) I had a blast today! Friday we are going to the River with Matt Cullen and friends and then going to the river walk with the fam to show Nora around Downtown and of course the Alamo! I hope they are having as much fun as i am! :)

God is doing amazing things! I am suppose to find out soon if i am accepted into Operation Mobilization! Thats pretty exciting for me, Also i think i am interviewing to help out with Royal Family Kids Camp Sunday! So i am pretty excited to see what Gods plans are for me! Prayers are very appreciated! :)

Lots of Love!!!

Morgan's Wonderland

2010-04-03T10:48:00.001-07:00

Yesterday i went to Morgan's Wonderland with the Grant Family... It was SO FUN! :) Morgan's Wonderland is the first amusement park that is solely focused on people with Special Needs. Everything in the park is based around the girl Morgan Hartman and her father Gordon Hartman(Which i had the pleasure of meeting yesterday) did all of this for her! It was so cool, And seriously its about time! :) Seriously this park is incredible and just all around a beautiful thing! The employees are very friendly, the security system is absolutely incredible! There is no way of losing a child or someone being able to take them from that park! Anyways, i got to play with Rachel all day and it was very cool! She had a blast and so did I! God Bless Morgan's Wonderland! Grand Opening is on April 10th. If you know anyone with Special Needs and you live in Texas i would recommend it! :) This Picture is Morgan by the by... You can read more about this incredible place at http://www.morganswonderland.com/index.html

Enjoy! :)

Oh... And Marie and Nora come tomorrow! If you dont know them... Marie was our foreign exchange student from Germany and Nora is her sister. They will be here for a week, i am stoked! I haven't seen her since January! :) My German Sister is comin to her American Home! :)

Exhilarating Experience.

2010-04-01T11:36:00.001-07:00

My Exciting experience for today... My College, Northeast Lakeview College went on lock down at approximately 12:05 this afternoon due to a chain of events that occurred at Kitty Hawk Middle School right down the road....

This is how our lockdown went.

This mysterious number called our phones 6 times leaving multiple voice mails in the middle of class, ok... Creepers!
They would not let anyone out or in buildings... If you were walking from one building to the next you were officially used at bate for any assassin or person wanting to inflict pain. I relate it to the scene of Twilight New Moon where the Bad Vampires are bringing in people to tour that one place in Italy and well... Ate them!

In Conclusion, If the attacker was on the campus of my college i would have died or watched the poor students stuck outside die because of the very unorganized lock down...

My Exhilarating Experience for the day! Wow, Im wrecked! I think because of this very terrifying event and that it is my moms birthday today, Oh and i did the worst work out video today that almost killed me right there and then... Therefore, i think i have deserved the right to eat something fattening and sweet and fantastic tonight...

Terra, I hope this was a good enough post for you today!

I quote myself "I am the worst blogger!"

2010-03-12T12:06:00.000-08:00

It has been quite a while! Oops... Ok... So Thursday i took 3 mid terms which i think went pretty well... I had two last saturday which leaves one class. Praise God we dont have a mid term in that class. I was thinking the other day i should just repeat over and over "I love tests I love tests I love tests I love tests!" Then maybe i would get good at them :) Yea, i dont think it will work! haha

Updates on the Mission... All my amazing recommendation filler outers have so kindly dont their recommendations for me, Now i have to fill out paper work and get a physical and take a personality test. My goal is to be finished with this phase before this month is over. I am praying and i would appreciate ya'lls prayers in me finding a place cheap to get a physical that would take time to fill out the paper work with care and thought into it. (a physician has to fill out all this stuff... Boring... i know!) Anyways, that is what is going there. PRAISE GOD!

I am doing this work out program with my mom and a great friend Cindy Dinsmore. It is Chalene Johnson... HOLY COW it kicks my butt... But i am pretty much addicted at this point i think! It has been two weeks so far and i am already noticing my energy level shooting up(as if i needed any more of that) and all around i am just feeling so fresh(after i shower of course) and healthy! My mom bought mangos which is my all time favorite fruit and i ate a whole one for breakfast yesterday after working out... Turns out i had orange stains all around my mouth.... And i found out at school that i had orange stains on my pants too. I will take that as a warning that i need to calm down when mangos are in sight. (I eat the peel too, my mom almost hurled when she saw me... It was kind funny!)

Then today, God totally showed himself! A very good friend of mine and i mended hurt feelings and working toward restoring our relationship. The burdon of wearing that pain was so heavy and thick but that is SO gone now and i can breathe so much easier. It amazes me how often i let my burdons affect my physical self.. Like health wise whenever i am stressed i get so tight and my asthma is worse and everything about me is just so on edge. But God freed me from that this morning. It has been a GREAT day! Worked out, had oat meal, Made amense with my sister in Christ, Went on a walk with my momma and the dogs, came home, blogged and am waiting for my sister to get home so we can go to the Grants house to nanny for their 3 angels. I look forward to it!

I am going to try to keep this up a little more... I will try i will try i will try i will try, maybe it will work! :)

Lots of Love! Blessings, Britt

Ohhhh life!!!

2010-02-18T14:01:00.001-08:00

After a fantastic trip to Paris and Germany visiting my German sister Marie, and after heading to the Ukraine to pick up 3 gorgeous babies which i love so very very much life seemed to have taken flight in a positive happy ora of greatness! Then... i came home! At first i was on fire so excited about adoption and missions and just all around full of joy! Lately i have lost that joy that i had when i was around those babies.... So now... I am certain i have found the solution to my slight decrease of funk and stokedness of life... Babies. In order to find that joy i felt in the Ukraine with those children i need to get some babies! :) hahaha.... Of course i know that this will not happen very soon, i am also very aware that what i want to have caused the joy, and what actually caused the joy are two totally different things! GOD is the sole reason for any joy i felt there and will feel now. BUT babies did play a part in it! For months i have been shuffling back and forth of what kind of missionary work i wanted to do... Whether it be just helping people in their towns build stuff or cook for them or what not! Now i am fairly certain that i am called to be around children overseas... I really want to work in Orphanages overseas but we'll see where God leads me with that whole thing! Overall, even though my current battle with finding joy in my present circumstances(which just happens to be a boredom of life and a urge to be on a mission somewhere else right now) I know that God is teaching me, shaping me, helping me find peace and have patience in this time of waiting so anxiously for March to come around to find out where i will be goin on my mission come 2011. Its just that week or two long of blahhhh period in the year! I am praying it will leave my spirit soon but i am also grateful to learn from this time too.

Oh and for anyone reading.... Because of my long lost older sister Terra Phelps whom i love dearly, I have decided to start blogging more regularly... Hopefully i will get around to adding pictures from the big trip i took about a month ago! Anywhooo... Much love and God bless your precious self!

Let The Waters Rise!!!

2009-09-24T19:56:00.001-07:00

There is a song by Mikeschair that i LOVE soooo much!

It pumps me up... Its Let the waters rise.

Listening to it gives me hope. I have so much faith and motivation after i hear it. I want to follow God through all of my life. Not just the good times. But in the bad times. All of it. If there is something that i have to go through to get to where God wants me to be then so be it. BRING IT ON!!!!

I will follow you Papa. I will follow you alone!

Hurting and suffering is only painful for the moment. The outcome and the lesson learned is endless. I've had pain surround me for a lot of years, and i did nothing but complain or have self pity. No more. I make a vow to embrace pain head on. Im not scared anymore. I have no reason to be scared! My God is bigger than anything satan can even think about throwing at me.

I don't want satan to get side track. He has been convinced for to long that he is going to win this battle. But we know the future. We know God wins in the end. I am making it a personal goal to live my life reminding satan day by day that he isn't going to win. So that he should just give up! :) This battle isn't pretty. And i am not about to let fear or self pity get me down and out of this fight!

Lets go

UNITE BELIEVERS!!!!

p.s. if you havent heard that song let the waters rise by Mikeschair i suggest it! :) Youtube.com has it... Listen listen listen! Its sooo encouraging

Genuine

2009-08-25T20:30:00.000-07:00

These past weeks as ive been talking to God it has seemed that there is one thing he keeps bringing up to me. Its Love. Pure Genuine Love. I have to admit the pure genuine kind can in some cases be the hardest thing in the world to pull off. He's asked me to be a light to someone who i love. The thing about this particular case is that me being a light is one me laying down my feelings and putting them to the side, cause they are not whats most important. And in doing that hes asked me to be a one way accountability to him. Just a daily reminder to stay in touch with the God. The result of this im afraid is that my relationship with this particular person will never be the same. Cause Gods method in getting to him is honesty and nagging almost. But in a good way. I feel a bittersweet emotion. I am sad that my obedience means sacrificing a relationship that meant so much to me! But i am stoked because i know that God is working through me cause half the time i have no idea what i send or what im writing until after its sent and i re read. its trippy sometimes looking back and being like.. uhhhh i dont remember writing that! Its cool though at the same time. And i know that God is going to use him and is using him and wants to use him for greatness!

Genuine Love is sacrifice

is discipline

is letting go of somethings to let them grow

is being there

is forgiving

is doubtless

is pure

is shameless

is fulfilling

is happy

sometimes makes you feel sad

is great

is blameless

is patient

is kind

is accepting

is putting others before yourself

is giving endless amounts to everyone

This Love can only be received by devoting your life to God. Im working on it. But my goal is to Love like this. Even when it means giving up things i love. Its not about me its about God.

I had to get that off my chest. Just something ive been thinking about

Utter Happiness

2009-08-02T17:45:00.000-07:00

This month has been amazing! God has come through on so many different levels. I feel as though i am closer with him than i ever have been. I owe a lot of that to a really amazing guy. He challenged me and pushed me to never settle for less than i deserve. I cant take credit and say i was just being a good christian. Cause that would be lying! God blessed me. Abundantly and i am awestruck! I really cant put into words how absolutely in love i am with God and his faithfulness. Its hard to keep God first in a relationship with a guy who you care so deeply for. But i think we did a pretty good job at that. Trusting God with everything is hard but also not impossible! God has been with the both of us throughout it all and i know that he will continue to stand by our side. Together and apart. And though we are apart right now i know that if God intended us to be together we will be. I have faith that if its what is right he'll bring us back to each other and it will be more amazing and fulfilling than when we first got together. I ask anyone who may read this (Doubt anyone reads my blog anyway but just in case) to pray for God to give me more patience and to continue to trust him with everything. Also pray for the amazing guy God blessed me with. God is Good. All the Time! God bless all of you and please let me know if you have any prayer requests. I love praying for people so lemme know! :)

God Speed

Powerful King

2009-02-25T19:42:00.000-08:00

I am so incredibly grateful to have a GOD that is almighty and all knowing!!! Its encouraging to know that there is one person who will never fail you! When all your friends let you down in some way we still have a GOD that is forever faithful! Its mind bottling really!! Just knowing that he loves us that much! Tonight at church David was leading worship and i mean Dave is just a great worship leader in general! He has a gift and we have been very blessed to have him in our church to lead us... but there was something different about the set that he chose tonight! I was just so consumed in worship... I had the urge to sing at the top of my lungs so i did! I was screaming without screaming(that may not make much sense but i get it in my head). I just felt this tingly feeling all over my body! I knew GOD was with me!!! IT WAS THE BEST THING EVER!!!! Normally i would only get that high off worship at a church camp and ive always wanted to have that spiritual high at home and i got that tonight!!! GOD is so good! He is always lookin out for me :) MY GOD IS GREAT!!!!! I know that in the end every knee will bow and every tounge confess that GOD is King forever!

It breaks my heart to see people who are lost hurting. I live by example. They know what i believe and why i believe it. I pray for them and i know God will work in them and i have faith that they will come to know him. I just cant help but cry when they tell me about their brokenness!! I feel like our hearts are connected and mine breaks when theirs do! You can imagine im sure how emotional i am! haha!! :) Crying makes you stronger in my opinion! Please pray for NESA and Johnson and for me that i would continue to be a light in these dark places! I would appreciate that so much! God Bless You!

One Day Soon

2009-02-25T19:38:00.000-08:00

When i was a sophmore i dated this guy who was a senior that didnt want anything serious from me. He wanted a good time and that was it. He made that very clear to me but me being stupid i thought i could minister to him(he wasnt a christian) and make him love me and change his mind... Well again i will admit i was very stupid and naiive and i failed at that little attempt and ended up giving him my first kiss... And after i told him he was my first kiss he stopped talking to me. After that i knew i never wanted to kiss anyone unless they would really apprecaite that kind of thing.So a little while ago i made a promise to myself, God, and my future husband that i wouldnt kiss anyone until i was standing face to face with my fiance at the alter waiting for the preacher to say "You may now kiss the Bride." And dont get me wrong i am so excited for that moment because i know that that first kiss with my husband will be spectacular and dreamy just like the movies!But there is this long period of time where there is Temptation, Cute Boys(that arent mature enough to marry you yet and arent even thinking about marrying you, People telling you youre crazy and that you will never be able to do it, Lonliness, and other negative things pulling you down in the dumps...Ya see... i made this purity pledge a while ago and well... boys dont like girls like me so i havent been tempted with it much but today as i was in rehearsal for the One Act play we are doing called Unexpected Tenderness which i am playing the role of Molly(the mother) and since in the play i am married to Archie there are numerous occassions when one that is married would normally kiss your spouse well... since im not married... and made the pledge i cant do them! And up to this moment i have been so good and not tempted by it at all... And then people start to raise question about why you wont kiss them, and how it would make the show better...then these thoughts come to mind about whether or not i should and i know that this is satan telling me to do it and trying to make me believe that it will make the show better i did kiss my fellow actor and its frustrating and hard but...to get to the point i realize that waiting to kiss my husband has so many more positive things than negative things. and while the negative things may be hard and may sometimes make me forget about the positive things i know that i will be giving my husband something that not a lot of other peoples spouses will have been given. I believe kisses are special. I believe that society has turned kissing into the norm... just something that you do... Thats why i made this purity pledge for myself so i can give my husband something ive been dreaming of since i was a little girl! And even though the chances of him being able to give me the same thing back are slim ill be able to know and be proud of the fact that in the tough times when temptation to kiss someone was knocking at my door i kept strong and held on to the promise i made to my future husband.

Hope from God

2009-01-05T18:19:00.000-08:00

This past week my beautiful cousins from Arizona were visiting me cause they wanted to go to Winter Camp with me... Daryn had come before for summer camp but this was Jordi's first time here. I was so excited for them to come and even more excited to share the word with them. I found that over the short retreat i became fired up about their faith with God and just had this longing to see them have the relationship with God that i do. By the end of the weekend i was pumped for two reasons. The first because my relationship with my cousins grew more than i could ever have dreamed it and i am now an accountability partner with them! I am excited to see where God leads them. AND the second is to reach out to my school more than just having a bible study every monday morning but by constantly spreading Gods love and grace to anyone and everyone i see!!! Please pray for my cousins as their new journey begins as well as for me and my school to accept Gods love!

Christmas Season At Last!!!

2008-12-13T09:57:00.001-08:00

I know for me personally when the Christmas season rolls around I get so busy with school and getting presents and hanging out with friends that i am to busy to remember what Christmas is really about and how incredible Christmas is not because of the things that my family and friends will buy me but because it is the day when True Love was born into this world. The day when hope re-entered into our lives. This Christmas especially i have been very aware of my schedule and have tried my very hardest not to get to busy that way i can have time for God to just say thank you. And its been hard telling people no a lot harder than i would have ever thought it to be but i feel good. I have found that i have been filled with 10 times as much joy than i have in the past two years. And Ive even noticed a difference at school too... I talk to my friends at school and they are constantly weighed down by the world by their overloaded commitments and i feel free. I can take a deep breath and not have to worry about being late for five different things. Ever since Aaron's sermon at the beginning of the school year about not overloading your schedule and making sure to have time to be lazy and do nothing i have tried my best not to forget it. And i am proud to say that my first semester is pretty much over and i have not yet had a mental breakdown over school!!!! (Which for me is a very big accomplishment!) I look forward to another year... To Graduating and going to college. To starting my life and going with the flow! I figure if God already knows what i will be when i grow up and who i will marry how many kids ill have what ill struggle with and what will be totally awesome for me then i might as well not try to stress myself out with the unknown! Its a great feeling and i recommend it for anyone!! God Bless You and keep you safe!

And be lazy every now and again. Relax by your Christmas tree and listen to some music, lay in the lawn and stare and the stars, Be free from the chains of time and rush... Its worth it! : )